ஆரபி

"சத்தியமா சொல்றேன்டா அதே பொண்ணு தான். இந்த தரம் சீக்ரமாவே கண்டுபுடிச்சுட்டேன் அவ இருந்த கோச்ச. நான் ஏன் பொய் சொல்ல போறேன்?"

"என்னவோ சொல்றடா மகேஷா. எவ பின்னாடியோ சுத்திண்டு அப்பா பணத்த வீணடிக்காத. நா சொல்றத சொல்லிட்டேன் இதுக்கப்பறம் ஒன்னோட இஷ்டம்"

"என்னடா இப்படி எல்லாம் சொல்லற. யார் கேட்டாலும் சாய் தான் எனக்கு தோஸ்து-னு சொல்ற என்கிட்ட போயி எப்படியோ போங்க்றியே?"

"ஆரம்பிக்காதடா  ஒன்னோட புராணத்த. என்ன பண்ணனும் நான் ஒனக்கு?" 

"எதுவும் வேண்டாம். நான் சொல்றத கேட்டுண்டு பொறுத்துக்கோ. இத எல்லாம் ஷேர் பண்ணிக்க நேக்கு யார்டா இருக்கா இந்த ஊர்ல?"

"பேசாத படுடா. லேட்டா போனா அந்த எகனாமிக்ஸ் வாத்தியார் கடன்காரன் வெய்வான் கம்மனாட்டி னு எல்லா பொண்ணுங்க முன்னாடியும். நாளைக்கு சாயங்காலம் பேசிக்கலாம். தூங்கு"

சொல்லிவிட்டு தூங்கிவிட்டான் சாய். மகேஷ் தூக்கம் இழந்து ஒரு வாரம் ஆனது. 

"நாளைக்கு அவ பேரயாவுது கண்டு புடிக்கணும்" நினைத்துகொண்டே கடந்த ஆறு நாட்களின் நிகழ்வுகளை மனத்திரையில் ஓட்டிப்பார்தான் 

முதல் முறை அவன் அவளை பார்த்தது தாம்பரம் ரயில்வே ஸ்டேஷனில் தான். அண்ணலும் நோக்கினான் அவளும் நோக்கினாள்-இல் பாதி நடந்தது. அண்ணல் நோக்கினான் நோக்கினான் நோக்கினான்.

கடலும் ஆறும் ஒன்றோடோன்று பிணைகின்ற இடத்தில் நீர் இருக்குமே ஒரு கருநீல வண்ணத்தில், அந்த நிறத்தில் ஒரு புடவை. ரயில் பெட்டியில் உள்ள கைப்பிடிக்கு இணை குடுத்து அவள் காதில் உள்ள தோடுகள் ஆட, அவன் கண்ணிற்கு மட்டுமே பட்டிருக்க வேண்டுமே என்று தெரிந்த தெய்வத்தஎல்லாம் கூப்பிட வைத்தாள். ஆஞ்சநேயர் ஐயப்பன் உட்பட .

முதல் நாள் இப்படியே சென்றது. மாம்பலத்தில் இறங்கி விட்டாள் அவள். கூடவே அவன் மனமும் கால் முளைத்து ஓடிச்சென்று அவள் வலதுகையின் சிறு விரலை பிடித்துக்கொண்டது.

அடுத்தநாள் அதே ரயில். இளஞ்சிவப்பு நிற புடவை. அருகில் சென்று முகத்தை இன்னும் தெளிவாக பார்க்கலாம் என்று தைரியத்தை வரவைத்துக்கொண்டு அவளுக்கு ஒரு மூன்றடி தள்ளி நின்றான். 

கையில் இருந்த ரேடியோவிலிருந்து மகாராஜபுரம் நாகராஜன்  "ஜூதமுராரே" பாடுவது  கேட்டது அவனுக்கு. "சாயங்காலம் நாமளும் ஒரு காசெட்டு வாங்கணும்" என்று தனக்குதானே சொல்லிக்கொண்டான்.

இப்படியே நான்கு நாட்கள் கழிந்தது. 

ஐந்தாவது நாள். பேசியே தீர வேண்டும் என்ற முடிவுடன் காலையில் கோவிலுக்கெல்லாம் சென்றுவிட்டு கிளம்பினான். 

கண்ணுக்கு இதம் தரும் கிளிப்பச்சையில் புடவை ஒன்று அணிந்திருந்தாள். "இவ்வளவு அழகு ஒருத்திக்கு ஆகாதும்மா" என்ற பிரம்மிப்புடன் நடந்தான் அவளை நோக்கி. 

இன்று பாலமுரளிகிருஷ்ணாவின் "தீன தயாலோ". கண்ணை மூடி ரசித்து கொண்டிருந்தாள். இவனும் பாட்டு முடிந்தவுடன் பேசிடலாம் என்று காத்துக்கொண்டேஇருந்தான். மீனம்பாக்கம் தொடங்கி சைதாபேட்டை வரை இழுத்துக்கொண்டே இருந்தார் பாலமுரளி. 

"அப்பாடா. ஒரு வழியா முடிஞ்சுது" என்று எண்ணிக்கொண்டே "எக்ச்குஸ் மீ?" என்றான்.

"அட மகேஷா !! சௌக்கியமா டா? எட்டாவதுல பாத்தது. எவளோ மாறிட்ட டா நீ! மீச எல்லாம் மொளச்சுடுத்து. ஞாமகம் இருக்கோல்லியோ என்ன? சாம்பு மாமா பையன் டா. சக்கரபாணி. எறங்கு கீழ. கோமதி சங்கர் ல காராமணி மிச்சர் சுட சுட போட்டுருப்பான். வா போயி சாப்டுண்டே பேசலாம். ஆறு வருஷ கதை பாக்கி இருக்கு பேச!"

"பூஜைல கரடி மாறி நோழஞ்சுட்டு காராமணி கேக்கறது பார் பக்கி" என்று சபித்துக்கொண்டே "கூடவே டிகிரி  காப்பியும் " என்று சக்கரபாணி சொன்னதை காதில் வாங்கிக்கொண்டே இறங்கினான்.

ஆறாவது நாள் தூக்கம் போச்சு.

ஏழாம் நாள். "இன்னிக்கு அவ பெயராவது  கேட்டுடுவேன்" என்று சாயிடம் சபதம் போடாத குறை. சொல்லிவிட்டு கிளம்பினான்.

அதே ரயில். சவுக்காரம் விளம்பரத்தில் வர அளவுக்கு வெண்மையான நிறத்தில் ஒரு புடவை, கருப்பு பூக்களுடன். "சினிமாக்காரியா இருந்தா அப்பா ஒத்துப்பாளா?" என்ற கவலையெல்லாம் வரத்தொடங்கியது அவனுக்கு.

அருகில் தோழி போலும். "இன்னிக்கும் முடியாதோ என்று கவலையோடு அவளை நோக்கி பார்த்தான். அவளும் நோக்கினாள்"

பாம்பே ஜெயஸ்ரீயின் "ஸ்ரீ சரஸ்வதி"  ஒலித்தது ரேடியோவிலிருந்து.

விரல்களால் ஏதோ சேதி சொன்னாள் அவள் தோழியிடம்.

"இந்தாங்க இத படிங்க" என்று மடித்த காகிதம் ஒன்றை கொடுத்தாள் அவள் தோழி.

"ஆறு நாளா ஒரே ராகத்துல பாட்டு கேட்டுண்டு இருக்கேனே. இன்னுமா புரியலை? அசடு.!" என்று ஆரம்பித்தது அந்த கடிதம்.

அவள் பெயர் ஆரபி.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it is 2012.

2012 is here and like the learned of today has told us to, we conveniently have ignored all scientific beliefs and have decided to believe the Mayans. Though the linguists have managed to understand not a single character of the Mayan script they are pretty sure that the Mayans believed that the world would end precisely on the 21st of December 2012. Some insufficiently educated scientists claim that when it is 21st of December elsewhere it would be 22nd in Australia but the theologists have strong evidence of the Mayan inscriptions. Now that we don't have a choice but to believe that the world would power off in December, we might as well prepare ourselves for the end. Though the power of the Almighty is way beyond the comprehension of man, the world has been gifted with a few super powers like Chuck Norris who might end up saving the world after all. 


After rigorous sessions of brainstorming the United Nations superpower committee has narrowed down to the following and wants the committees of the other organisations to vote in favour of one of them.


Plan 1: 


Our first resort would be Sachin Tendulkar. As always he will be the man of the hour. For those who are raising an eyebrow along with irrelevant questions like "How?" the committee has the following answer. Sachin Tendulkar would stall from scoring his 100th 100 well past the 21st of December as he has got plans to visit Australia and New Zealand along with his family at the expense of the BCCI during the next world cup. He has assured that he will score his hundredth ton during the India England series of 2015 where Dravid's son is all set to make his debut. Since Sachin would not have scored his hundredth ton by 21st of December the world cannot possibly come to an end. Brilliant ain't it?


Well, if at all Sachin fails to deliver by scoring his century we have back ups.


Plan 2: 


Anna Hazare has promised that he would go on a fast unto death against the end of the world with just an hour's break everyday for lunch.


Plan 3:


Hrithik Roshan and Abishek Bacchan are our next resort. They have confirmed that the script for Dhoom-22 is ready and they would do all that they can to stop the world from shutting down in December. When pestered consistently they revealed that the story has an amazing chase sequence which was inspired from a similar sequences in Dhoom-1 to Dhoom 21. Abhishek also added that the Bacchan daughter makes her debut in that movie and said that he will do all that it takes to enjoy that proud moment. 


Plan 4: 


Vijay Tv has promised that they'll conduct the finals of Super singer on the 21st of December. Their event will make sure that the whole world is distracted from the destruction happening outside while the people are glued to their tv sets. Just like their previous editions the finals would extend till the next day as this time the fathers of the contestants have also promised to cry. 


Plan 5:


Plan 5 is the god of all back ups. If all the above plans fail, we'd be consulting the only man who can make anything possible- Rajnikanth.


Happy new year :)

..And all fall down.

"Ajay! Be a responsible brother and take care of your sisters. Look at the Pooja. Careful, Ajay." Lalitha screamed through the living room window above the noise the vacuum cleaner was making.

"Maa. I'll take care. They're just playing. Don't worry", said the pseudo responsible eleven year old.
Lalitha was married to Ashok. Ashok was an affectionate husband. A chemical engineer turned Human resources manager. He knew how to handle people. And Lalitha was a Math teacher at the neighborhood school. They were a happy family of five. Ajay the eldest was in class seven while the younger ones, the twins,  Priya and Pooja were in class three.

*****                                                            

"Lalitha, Vinay wants to meet you. He looked a bit worried.", said one of their mutual friends.

"I'll meet him on the way back home."


"The fuck is this Lalitha? What is happening? I go out of town for a week and your dad sets you up with some other guy? He promised right? He said he'd wait.". To say Vinay was agitated was like saying winters are quite cool in Kashmir.


"I know, Vinay. Calm down. He says he won't marry me off to some punk"


"I'm a musician. Not a punk"


"I know. He doesn't. What should I do, Vinay?"
"Stand up to him. I can't take you with me now. Stall for a couple of years. Can't you do that? You didn't say 'yes', did you?"
There was no reply.


"You did? You agreed? Fuck!"


"No. I did not. But I didn't say no either. He is like, mom and he are getting old. They have to make sure I settle well and all that"


"I am trying, Lalitha. It's not like I don't want to get settled. I still don't think dropping out from engineering was a mistake. I love the guitar. I love you as much. Wait! It is not Bharath right? Tell me it is not him. It should be him. Software engineer, my foot. His codes can't make people happy. My music can. Tell me it is not him!"


"No it is not him. Why would it be him? High school was a mistake. Why would you even ask that question, Vinay?"


"I'm sorry. He is better than me in every way. Except that he is an asshole. Also I love you more. He earns a handful. he was the ideal student in school."


"It doesn't matter Vinay. It doesn't matter if he earns a handful. It doesn't matter if he is my dad's favorite. You're the better person because he chose to leave and you didn't."

*****

"Pooja. Don't sit on the ground. Get up now. Come lets play "ringa ringa". Amma, look at Pooja here. Get up, now"


"I'll be done with this room in ten minutes. Hang on till then"

*****

Lalitha weds Ashok. Yes, it did happen. There was no fairy tale episode where Lalitha could've eloped with Vinay and lived happily ever after. Alas, "happily ever after" is a theorist's perception of life. Vinay returned home to this news and was not outraged or saddened. He was rather helpless. It was a perfect marriage. Some US returned MBA fellow they said. He couldn't contact her. Even facebook did not lend a hand.


It's been twelve years and three months. Vinay had grown numb. But the fact that he finally found out where she lived and with whom. He decided to give her a surprise. He reached Lalitha's place. He saw the kids playing in the garden. Smiles were exchanged. He felt the pain after a long time. It should have been his kids which she bore. And then reality struck. The garden wouldn't have been this big. The house wouldn't have been this huge. Lalitha did settle well. Just like how her dad wanted her to. 




Vinay went in search of her. Madras. Then he thought someone said something about Bangalore. So he went there. He gave up. It is a huge country. Maybe they left the country. He took up drinking. He was a familiar face in almost every bar in Bangalore. He started playing the guitar in one of those bars. He had a stomach to fill. He had found a job for himself. 

*****

He knocked the door. Lalitha was more shocked than surprised. She didn't say a word. The sunlight from the sharp blade fell on her face. He closed her mouth. She couldn't scream above the vacuum cleaner's noise.

"Amma! Look at Pooja. She is playing with the mud again" Ajay came running. She breathed her last and the vacuum cleaner died. He turned towards the kids.

Pooja and Priya were holding hands "Husha, busha, all fall down..."

I might as well join the bandwagon

This post can also be titled "A day in the life of " or just in case the limelight misses you "How I joined a billion people in worrying about Tendulkar's ton :-)" 


Before you get all worked up and go "the fuck is this, the fuck is that" on the comments section, I'd like to make four things clear:
1. I'm as much a fan of Sachin as you are. You are probably better because no matter what I say, you will claim so.


2. Sachin will NOT read this blog post even if his astrologer says that reading this will make getting the 100th hundred easier.


3. It's an undeniable fact that Sachin is one of the greatest ever to have swung the willow because none has tried denying it in the first place. Also because it is kinda true.


4. Read points 1-3 until you are clear.


It is indeed sad that a handful of recent happenings have stolen the thunder from Sachin, who, now probably is at some dimly lit bar in Melbourne drinking away his woes. It is important to get over sorrow to become successful. The popular saying goes 'jo jeeta hai woe hi sikkandar'. It has been a real tight competition among Sachin, Kapil Sibal, Anna Hazare and a bunch of corrupt politicians. But in the end, cricket has been the winner, every time.


Godwin's law says that every discussion on the internet will sooner or later end up in Nazi bashing. The Indian version of it is that every discussion will end up with the conversationalists worrying about Tendulkar's hundred not unlike the Tambrahm parent concerned about the son's centum in Mathematics or a bad joke on death and destruction. I ask you one simple question which I have asked myself numerous times in vain, why?

Immediate attention and all that, but there is an etiquette to make jokes, right? Everything is not a joke. There was a fire in a hospital at Calcutta today. The death toll reached 20. And somewhere someone has been making "Who will reach 100 first? Death toll or Sachin?" No expletive can express how cruel this is. It's a welcome change that people have started taking things light. You move on, make a couple of jokes and laugh about it. But when? Not when Rome is still burning. If you come to me with "Nero became famous because he played when Rome was burning. Not when Rome was, well, not burning" I will reply with "fornicate thee" in street language. I'm not asking you to cut down the jokes completely or something like that. I spend major part of my day coming up with pathetic jokes myself. But there is a line and most of us are crossing it even before we tweet or put up a facebook update. 


Wait. I know what you are thinking.I asked you not to talk about Sachin everywhere but I did here.
I asked you not to make jokes about death but I did here.


I being one among you in the society will escape with the same excuse. Everyone is busy coming up with stuff like this, so, I might as well join the bandwagon.