Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it is 2012.

2012 is here and like the learned of today has told us to, we conveniently have ignored all scientific beliefs and have decided to believe the Mayans. Though the linguists have managed to understand not a single character of the Mayan script they are pretty sure that the Mayans believed that the world would end precisely on the 21st of December 2012. Some insufficiently educated scientists claim that when it is 21st of December elsewhere it would be 22nd in Australia but the theologists have strong evidence of the Mayan inscriptions. Now that we don't have a choice but to believe that the world would power off in December, we might as well prepare ourselves for the end. Though the power of the Almighty is way beyond the comprehension of man, the world has been gifted with a few super powers like Chuck Norris who might end up saving the world after all. 

After rigorous sessions of brainstorming the United Nations superpower committee has narrowed down to the following and wants the committees of the other organisations to vote in favour of one of them.

Plan 1: 

Our first resort would be Sachin Tendulkar. As always he will be the man of the hour. For those who are raising an eyebrow along with irrelevant questions like "How?" the committee has the following answer. Sachin Tendulkar would stall from scoring his 100th 100 well past the 21st of December as he has got plans to visit Australia and New Zealand along with his family at the expense of the BCCI during the next world cup. He has assured that he will score his hundredth ton during the India England series of 2015 where Dravid's son is all set to make his debut. Since Sachin would not have scored his hundredth ton by 21st of December the world cannot possibly come to an end. Brilliant ain't it?

Well, if at all Sachin fails to deliver by scoring his century we have back ups.

Plan 2: 

Anna Hazare has promised that he would go on a fast unto death against the end of the world with just an hour's break everyday for lunch.

Plan 3:

Hrithik Roshan and Abishek Bacchan are our next resort. They have confirmed that the script for Dhoom-22 is ready and they would do all that they can to stop the world from shutting down in December. When pestered consistently they revealed that the story has an amazing chase sequence which was inspired from a similar sequences in Dhoom-1 to Dhoom 21. Abhishek also added that the Bacchan daughter makes her debut in that movie and said that he will do all that it takes to enjoy that proud moment. 

Plan 4: 

Vijay Tv has promised that they'll conduct the finals of Super singer on the 21st of December. Their event will make sure that the whole world is distracted from the destruction happening outside while the people are glued to their tv sets. Just like their previous editions the finals would extend till the next day as this time the fathers of the contestants have also promised to cry. 

Plan 5:

Plan 5 is the god of all back ups. If all the above plans fail, we'd be consulting the only man who can make anything possible- Rajnikanth.

Happy new year :)


  1. Haha! Looking forward to the doomed year.

  2. Watha! Sachin part ultimate!!!! :D :D super man Yu! :)

  3. Watha! Sachin part ultimate!!!! :D :D super man Yu! :)