Why did it end?
Because, he walked away.
Because, he walked away.
I don't think so.
Then why?
Because, she walked away also.
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Friday, December 30, 2011
ஆரபி
"சத்தியமா சொல்றேன்டா அதே பொண்ணு தான். இந்த தரம் சீக்ரமாவே கண்டுபுடிச்சுட்டேன் அவ இருந்த கோச்ச. நான் ஏன் பொய் சொல்ல போறேன்?"
"என்னவோ சொல்றடா மகேஷா. எவ பின்னாடியோ சுத்திண்டு அப்பா பணத்த வீணடிக்காத. நா சொல்றத சொல்லிட்டேன் இதுக்கப்பறம் ஒன்னோட இஷ்டம்"
"என்னடா இப்படி எல்லாம் சொல்லற. யார் கேட்டாலும் சாய் தான் எனக்கு தோஸ்து-னு சொல்ற என்கிட்ட போயி எப்படியோ போங்க்றியே?"
"ஆரம்பிக்காதடா ஒன்னோட புராணத்த. என்ன பண்ணனும் நான் ஒனக்கு?"
"எதுவும் வேண்டாம். நான் சொல்றத கேட்டுண்டு பொறுத்துக்கோ. இத எல்லாம் ஷேர் பண்ணிக்க நேக்கு யார்டா இருக்கா இந்த ஊர்ல?"
"பேசாத படுடா. லேட்டா போனா அந்த எகனாமிக்ஸ் வாத்தியார் கடன்காரன் வெய்வான் கம்மனாட்டி னு எல்லா பொண்ணுங்க முன்னாடியும். நாளைக்கு சாயங்காலம் பேசிக்கலாம். தூங்கு"
சொல்லிவிட்டு தூங்கிவிட்டான் சாய். மகேஷ் தூக்கம் இழந்து ஒரு வாரம் ஆனது.
"நாளைக்கு அவ பேரயாவுது கண்டு புடிக்கணும்" நினைத்துகொண்டே கடந்த ஆறு நாட்களின் நிகழ்வுகளை மனத்திரையில் ஓட்டிப்பார்தான்
முதல் முறை அவன் அவளை பார்த்தது தாம்பரம் ரயில்வே ஸ்டேஷனில் தான். அண்ணலும் நோக்கினான் அவளும் நோக்கினாள்-இல் பாதி நடந்தது. அண்ணல் நோக்கினான் நோக்கினான் நோக்கினான்.
கடலும் ஆறும் ஒன்றோடோன்று பிணைகின்ற இடத்தில் நீர் இருக்குமே ஒரு கருநீல வண்ணத்தில், அந்த நிறத்தில் ஒரு புடவை. ரயில் பெட்டியில் உள்ள கைப்பிடிக்கு இணை குடுத்து அவள் காதில் உள்ள தோடுகள் ஆட, அவன் கண்ணிற்கு மட்டுமே பட்டிருக்க வேண்டுமே என்று தெரிந்த தெய்வத்தஎல்லாம் கூப்பிட வைத்தாள். ஆஞ்சநேயர் ஐயப்பன் உட்பட .
முதல் நாள் இப்படியே சென்றது. மாம்பலத்தில் இறங்கி விட்டாள் அவள். கூடவே அவன் மனமும் கால் முளைத்து ஓடிச்சென்று அவள் வலதுகையின் சிறு விரலை பிடித்துக்கொண்டது.
அடுத்தநாள் அதே ரயில். இளஞ்சிவப்பு நிற புடவை. அருகில் சென்று முகத்தை இன்னும் தெளிவாக பார்க்கலாம் என்று தைரியத்தை வரவைத்துக்கொண்டு அவளுக்கு ஒரு மூன்றடி தள்ளி நின்றான்.
கையில் இருந்த ரேடியோவிலிருந்து மகாராஜபுரம் நாகராஜன் "ஜூதமுராரே" பாடுவது கேட்டது அவனுக்கு. "சாயங்காலம் நாமளும் ஒரு காசெட்டு வாங்கணும்" என்று தனக்குதானே சொல்லிக்கொண்டான்.
இப்படியே நான்கு நாட்கள் கழிந்தது.
ஐந்தாவது நாள். பேசியே தீர வேண்டும் என்ற முடிவுடன் காலையில் கோவிலுக்கெல்லாம் சென்றுவிட்டு கிளம்பினான்.
கண்ணுக்கு இதம் தரும் கிளிப்பச்சையில் புடவை ஒன்று அணிந்திருந்தாள். "இவ்வளவு அழகு ஒருத்திக்கு ஆகாதும்மா" என்ற பிரம்மிப்புடன் நடந்தான் அவளை நோக்கி.
இன்று பாலமுரளிகிருஷ்ணாவின் "தீன தயாலோ". கண்ணை மூடி ரசித்து கொண்டிருந்தாள். இவனும் பாட்டு முடிந்தவுடன் பேசிடலாம் என்று காத்துக்கொண்டேஇருந்தான். மீனம்பாக்கம் தொடங்கி சைதாபேட்டை வரை இழுத்துக்கொண்டே இருந்தார் பாலமுரளி.
"அப்பாடா. ஒரு வழியா முடிஞ்சுது" என்று எண்ணிக்கொண்டே "எக்ச்குஸ் மீ?" என்றான்.
"அட மகேஷா !! சௌக்கியமா டா? எட்டாவதுல பாத்தது. எவளோ மாறிட்ட டா நீ! மீச எல்லாம் மொளச்சுடுத்து. ஞாமகம் இருக்கோல்லியோ என்ன? சாம்பு மாமா பையன் டா. சக்கரபாணி. எறங்கு கீழ. கோமதி சங்கர் ல காராமணி மிச்சர் சுட சுட போட்டுருப்பான். வா போயி சாப்டுண்டே பேசலாம். ஆறு வருஷ கதை பாக்கி இருக்கு பேச!"
"அட மகேஷா !! சௌக்கியமா டா? எட்டாவதுல பாத்தது. எவளோ மாறிட்ட டா நீ! மீச எல்லாம் மொளச்சுடுத்து. ஞாமகம் இருக்கோல்லியோ என்ன? சாம்பு மாமா பையன் டா. சக்கரபாணி. எறங்கு கீழ. கோமதி சங்கர் ல காராமணி மிச்சர் சுட சுட போட்டுருப்பான். வா போயி சாப்டுண்டே பேசலாம். ஆறு வருஷ கதை பாக்கி இருக்கு பேச!"
"பூஜைல கரடி மாறி நோழஞ்சுட்டு காராமணி கேக்கறது பார் பக்கி" என்று சபித்துக்கொண்டே "கூடவே டிகிரி காப்பியும் " என்று சக்கரபாணி சொன்னதை காதில் வாங்கிக்கொண்டே இறங்கினான்.
ஆறாவது நாள் தூக்கம் போச்சு.
ஏழாம் நாள். "இன்னிக்கு அவ பெயராவது கேட்டுடுவேன்" என்று சாயிடம் சபதம் போடாத குறை. சொல்லிவிட்டு கிளம்பினான்.
அதே ரயில். சவுக்காரம் விளம்பரத்தில் வர அளவுக்கு வெண்மையான நிறத்தில் ஒரு புடவை, கருப்பு பூக்களுடன். "சினிமாக்காரியா இருந்தா அப்பா ஒத்துப்பாளா?" என்ற கவலையெல்லாம் வரத்தொடங்கியது அவனுக்கு.
அருகில் தோழி போலும். "இன்னிக்கும் முடியாதோ என்று கவலையோடு அவளை நோக்கி பார்த்தான். அவளும் நோக்கினாள்"
பாம்பே ஜெயஸ்ரீயின் "ஸ்ரீ சரஸ்வதி" ஒலித்தது ரேடியோவிலிருந்து.
விரல்களால் ஏதோ சேதி சொன்னாள் அவள் தோழியிடம்.
"இந்தாங்க இத படிங்க" என்று மடித்த காகிதம் ஒன்றை கொடுத்தாள் அவள் தோழி.
"ஆறு நாளா ஒரே ராகத்துல பாட்டு கேட்டுண்டு இருக்கேனே. இன்னுமா புரியலை? அசடு.!" என்று ஆரம்பித்தது அந்த கடிதம்.
அவள் பெயர் ஆரபி.
ஏழாம் நாள். "இன்னிக்கு அவ பெயராவது கேட்டுடுவேன்" என்று சாயிடம் சபதம் போடாத குறை. சொல்லிவிட்டு கிளம்பினான்.
அதே ரயில். சவுக்காரம் விளம்பரத்தில் வர அளவுக்கு வெண்மையான நிறத்தில் ஒரு புடவை, கருப்பு பூக்களுடன். "சினிமாக்காரியா இருந்தா அப்பா ஒத்துப்பாளா?" என்ற கவலையெல்லாம் வரத்தொடங்கியது அவனுக்கு.
அருகில் தோழி போலும். "இன்னிக்கும் முடியாதோ என்று கவலையோடு அவளை நோக்கி பார்த்தான். அவளும் நோக்கினாள்"
பாம்பே ஜெயஸ்ரீயின் "ஸ்ரீ சரஸ்வதி" ஒலித்தது ரேடியோவிலிருந்து.
விரல்களால் ஏதோ சேதி சொன்னாள் அவள் தோழியிடம்.
"இந்தாங்க இத படிங்க" என்று மடித்த காகிதம் ஒன்றை கொடுத்தாள் அவள் தோழி.
"ஆறு நாளா ஒரே ராகத்துல பாட்டு கேட்டுண்டு இருக்கேனே. இன்னுமா புரியலை? அசடு.!" என்று ஆரம்பித்தது அந்த கடிதம்.
அவள் பெயர் ஆரபி.
Monday, December 12, 2011
..And all fall down.
"Ajay! Be a responsible brother and take care of your sisters. Look at the Pooja. Careful, Ajay." Lalitha screamed through the living room window above the noise the vacuum cleaner was making.
"Maa. I'll take care. They're just playing. Don't worry", said the pseudo responsible eleven year old.
Lalitha was married to Ashok. Ashok was an affectionate husband. A chemical engineer turned Human resources manager. He knew how to handle people. And Lalitha was a Math teacher at the neighborhood school. They were a happy family of five. Ajay the eldest was in class seven while the younger ones, the twins, Priya and Pooja were in class three.
*****
"Lalitha, Vinay wants to meet you. He looked a bit worried.", said one of their mutual friends.
"I'll meet him on the way back home."
"The fuck is this Lalitha? What is happening? I go out of town for a week and your dad sets you up with some other guy? He promised right? He said he'd wait.". To say Vinay was agitated was like saying winters are quite cool in Kashmir.
"I know, Vinay. Calm down. He says he won't marry me off to some punk"
"I'm a musician. Not a punk"
"I know. He doesn't. What should I do, Vinay?"
"Stand up to him. I can't take you with me now. Stall for a couple of years. Can't you do that? You didn't say 'yes', did you?"
There was no reply.
"You did? You agreed? Fuck!"
"No. I did not. But I didn't say no either. He is like, mom and he are getting old. They have to make sure I settle well and all that"
"I am trying, Lalitha. It's not like I don't want to get settled. I still don't think dropping out from engineering was a mistake. I love the guitar. I love you as much. Wait! It is not Bharath right? Tell me it is not him. It should be him. Software engineer, my foot. His codes can't make people happy. My music can. Tell me it is not him!"
"No it is not him. Why would it be him? High school was a mistake. Why would you even ask that question, Vinay?"
"I'm sorry. He is better than me in every way. Except that he is an asshole. Also I love you more. He earns a handful. he was the ideal student in school."
"It doesn't matter Vinay. It doesn't matter if he earns a handful. It doesn't matter if he is my dad's favorite. You're the better person because he chose to leave and you didn't."
"Pooja. Don't sit on the ground. Get up now. Come lets play "ringa ringa". Amma, look at Pooja here. Get up, now"
"I'll be done with this room in ten minutes. Hang on till then"
Lalitha weds Ashok. Yes, it did happen. There was no fairy tale episode where Lalitha could've eloped with Vinay and lived happily ever after. Alas, "happily ever after" is a theorist's perception of life. Vinay returned home to this news and was not outraged or saddened. He was rather helpless. It was a perfect marriage. Some US returned MBA fellow they said. He couldn't contact her. Even facebook did not lend a hand.
It's been twelve years and three months. Vinay had grown numb. But the fact that he finally found out where she lived and with whom. He decided to give her a surprise. He reached Lalitha's place. He saw the kids playing in the garden. Smiles were exchanged. He felt the pain after a long time. It should have been his kids which she bore. And then reality struck. The garden wouldn't have been this big. The house wouldn't have been this huge. Lalitha did settle well. Just like how her dad wanted her to.
Vinay went in search of her. Madras. Then he thought someone said something about Bangalore. So he went there. He gave up. It is a huge country. Maybe they left the country. He took up drinking. He was a familiar face in almost every bar in Bangalore. He started playing the guitar in one of those bars. He had a stomach to fill. He had found a job for himself.
*****
He knocked the door. Lalitha was more shocked than surprised. She didn't say a word. The sunlight from the sharp blade fell on her face. He closed her mouth. She couldn't scream above the vacuum cleaner's noise.
"Amma! Look at Pooja. She is playing with the mud again" Ajay came running. She breathed her last and the vacuum cleaner died. He turned towards the kids.
Pooja and Priya were holding hands "Husha, busha, all fall down..."
"Maa. I'll take care. They're just playing. Don't worry", said the pseudo responsible eleven year old.
Lalitha was married to Ashok. Ashok was an affectionate husband. A chemical engineer turned Human resources manager. He knew how to handle people. And Lalitha was a Math teacher at the neighborhood school. They were a happy family of five. Ajay the eldest was in class seven while the younger ones, the twins, Priya and Pooja were in class three.
*****
"Lalitha, Vinay wants to meet you. He looked a bit worried.", said one of their mutual friends.
"I'll meet him on the way back home."
"The fuck is this Lalitha? What is happening? I go out of town for a week and your dad sets you up with some other guy? He promised right? He said he'd wait.". To say Vinay was agitated was like saying winters are quite cool in Kashmir.
"I know, Vinay. Calm down. He says he won't marry me off to some punk"
"I'm a musician. Not a punk"
"I know. He doesn't. What should I do, Vinay?"
"Stand up to him. I can't take you with me now. Stall for a couple of years. Can't you do that? You didn't say 'yes', did you?"
There was no reply.
"You did? You agreed? Fuck!"
"No. I did not. But I didn't say no either. He is like, mom and he are getting old. They have to make sure I settle well and all that"
"I am trying, Lalitha. It's not like I don't want to get settled. I still don't think dropping out from engineering was a mistake. I love the guitar. I love you as much. Wait! It is not Bharath right? Tell me it is not him. It should be him. Software engineer, my foot. His codes can't make people happy. My music can. Tell me it is not him!"
"No it is not him. Why would it be him? High school was a mistake. Why would you even ask that question, Vinay?"
"I'm sorry. He is better than me in every way. Except that he is an asshole. Also I love you more. He earns a handful. he was the ideal student in school."
"It doesn't matter Vinay. It doesn't matter if he earns a handful. It doesn't matter if he is my dad's favorite. You're the better person because he chose to leave and you didn't."
*****
"Pooja. Don't sit on the ground. Get up now. Come lets play "ringa ringa". Amma, look at Pooja here. Get up, now"
"I'll be done with this room in ten minutes. Hang on till then"
*****
Lalitha weds Ashok. Yes, it did happen. There was no fairy tale episode where Lalitha could've eloped with Vinay and lived happily ever after. Alas, "happily ever after" is a theorist's perception of life. Vinay returned home to this news and was not outraged or saddened. He was rather helpless. It was a perfect marriage. Some US returned MBA fellow they said. He couldn't contact her. Even facebook did not lend a hand.
It's been twelve years and three months. Vinay had grown numb. But the fact that he finally found out where she lived and with whom. He decided to give her a surprise. He reached Lalitha's place. He saw the kids playing in the garden. Smiles were exchanged. He felt the pain after a long time. It should have been his kids which she bore. And then reality struck. The garden wouldn't have been this big. The house wouldn't have been this huge. Lalitha did settle well. Just like how her dad wanted her to.
Vinay went in search of her. Madras. Then he thought someone said something about Bangalore. So he went there. He gave up. It is a huge country. Maybe they left the country. He took up drinking. He was a familiar face in almost every bar in Bangalore. He started playing the guitar in one of those bars. He had a stomach to fill. He had found a job for himself.
*****
He knocked the door. Lalitha was more shocked than surprised. She didn't say a word. The sunlight from the sharp blade fell on her face. He closed her mouth. She couldn't scream above the vacuum cleaner's noise.
"Amma! Look at Pooja. She is playing with the mud again" Ajay came running. She breathed her last and the vacuum cleaner died. He turned towards the kids.
Pooja and Priya were holding hands "Husha, busha, all fall down..."
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Not a love story
It was a killer smile. She looked at me after sipping from her cup of coffee and smiled with the milky mush. That was the moment for me. Who would expect to be swept off their feet by a girl's mustache?
I had just broken up with a girl. She was caring, beautiful and smart. But something didn't work out. We had been going out for a couple of years. We thought we'd found each other. Soul mate and all that. We were planning to get married and then things went bad. I had to break it. And I did it, for the two of us. She was disappointed. Threw tantrums like a kid. Yes, a kid, that was what she was. But things moved on. I hadn't heard from her for a while then.
And there I was looking at the most beautiful pair of green eyes. I asked her if we could go out for a cup of coffee and realised the foolishness of the question only after she choked on her coffee, laughing. A few hours, days and weeks later, we were going out, officially.
It was our first month anniversary and her birthday was a couple of days away. I thought I'd give her an early birthday surprise. I took her to my place. Made the best dinner arrangements I could and there we were in the garden, under the starlit sky having what was probably the best conversation in silence. I was falling more and more in love with her. I hoped she did too for I had neither her beautiful eyes nor the killer smile.
She reminded me of my ex in more than one way. She was everything that she wasn't and everything that she was. I felt this need to love her for I thought someone else would come and take my place. It was like a kid's love towards the mother. Holding the hands ever so tight when the kid sees other children more due to fear of losing her than the love towards.
We had finished eating. I stood up, took her hand and we had a walk around the garden. I wished time stood still. I wished the dawn never broke. I wished there wasn't a limit to love.
We kissed. Gently. It was a cold night and I felt like it was summer. She said my lips tasted funny. In a good way though. She loved to say my name. We kissed again. I could feel the blood flowing through my veins. I felt a warm, surging pain. I didn't realise it was indeed my blood. I found the knife on the dinner table missing, only to find it sticking out of me.
It took only a couple of minutes for the fog to clear. But then it was too late. She was everything the other girl was. She was here to take my blood for I had taken the one's that she shared with. The dawn broke as I lay there still.
That was the last thing I saw. It was a killer smile.
I had just broken up with a girl. She was caring, beautiful and smart. But something didn't work out. We had been going out for a couple of years. We thought we'd found each other. Soul mate and all that. We were planning to get married and then things went bad. I had to break it. And I did it, for the two of us. She was disappointed. Threw tantrums like a kid. Yes, a kid, that was what she was. But things moved on. I hadn't heard from her for a while then.
And there I was looking at the most beautiful pair of green eyes. I asked her if we could go out for a cup of coffee and realised the foolishness of the question only after she choked on her coffee, laughing. A few hours, days and weeks later, we were going out, officially.
It was our first month anniversary and her birthday was a couple of days away. I thought I'd give her an early birthday surprise. I took her to my place. Made the best dinner arrangements I could and there we were in the garden, under the starlit sky having what was probably the best conversation in silence. I was falling more and more in love with her. I hoped she did too for I had neither her beautiful eyes nor the killer smile.
She reminded me of my ex in more than one way. She was everything that she wasn't and everything that she was. I felt this need to love her for I thought someone else would come and take my place. It was like a kid's love towards the mother. Holding the hands ever so tight when the kid sees other children more due to fear of losing her than the love towards.
We had finished eating. I stood up, took her hand and we had a walk around the garden. I wished time stood still. I wished the dawn never broke. I wished there wasn't a limit to love.
We kissed. Gently. It was a cold night and I felt like it was summer. She said my lips tasted funny. In a good way though. She loved to say my name. We kissed again. I could feel the blood flowing through my veins. I felt a warm, surging pain. I didn't realise it was indeed my blood. I found the knife on the dinner table missing, only to find it sticking out of me.
It took only a couple of minutes for the fog to clear. But then it was too late. She was everything the other girl was. She was here to take my blood for I had taken the one's that she shared with. The dawn broke as I lay there still.
That was the last thing I saw. It was a killer smile.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
First kiss
There are so many sweet incidents, memories and many random events which wouldn’t classify as anything meaningful to be shared. They made my world. Once in class seven, I was frantically walking around the class searching for something that I had lost. I didn’t notice that she was standing next to me. I was moving my hands all around the place and screaming at someone. She was apparently talking to someone nearby. My hands which were swinging in random directions made contact with her teeth. That was the closest any twelve year old would come to getting kissed. I remember laughing over this when I told her all about the incident a few years from then.
.
Friday, August 26, 2011
கிறுக்கல்கள்-2
காதல், வெட்கம் மற்றும் சில கவிதைக்கு அப்பாற்பட்ட காரணங்கள்.
கையில் பட்டாம்பூச்சி வண்ணமாய்,
கடற்கரை மண்ணில் காலடியாய்,
நெஞ்சில் உந்தன் முகம்
சுவடு வைத்து போனதடி.
சென்னை நகரில்,
கோடை கால குழாவைப்போல்,
உன்னை பார்க்கையில் , தாய் மொழியும் மறந்ததடி.
இருட்டிலும் பளிச்சிடும் பற்கள்,
வேலி போட்ட மல்லிகையடி.
ஆணுக்கு நானும்
பெண்ணுக்கு நீயும்
காதலுக்கு நாமும் உவமயடி.
இதுவரை நான் படித்த
கவிதைகளுக்கு அர்த்தம் புரிய வைத்து,
இனி நான் எழுதும் கவிதைகளுக்கு அர்த்தமாய் போனாயடி.
வெண்ணிலவும் வெட்கப்படதடி.
கவித்துவம்
காதோரம் கருமயிர் காற்றடித்து
கன்னத்தில்விழ
கைவிரலால் களைந்து
கண்சிமிட்டும் கவின்காட்சியை
காணக் கண் கோடிவேண்டும்.
வெள்ளைப்பொய்
வேறொருத்திக்கு நான் எழுதிய கவிதையை படித்து
என் கன்னத்தில் குழி விழுமா? என்றாய்.
கையில் பட்டாம்பூச்சி வண்ணமாய்,
கடற்கரை மண்ணில் காலடியாய்,
நெஞ்சில் உந்தன் முகம்
சுவடு வைத்து போனதடி.
சென்னை நகரில்,
கோடை கால குழாவைப்போல்,
உன்னை பார்க்கையில் , தாய் மொழியும் மறந்ததடி.
இருட்டிலும் பளிச்சிடும் பற்கள்,
வேலி போட்ட மல்லிகையடி.
ஆணுக்கு நானும்
பெண்ணுக்கு நீயும்
காதலுக்கு நாமும் உவமயடி.
இதுவரை நான் படித்த
கவிதைகளுக்கு அர்த்தம் புரிய வைத்து,
இனி நான் எழுதும் கவிதைகளுக்கு அர்த்தமாய் போனாயடி.
இரவில் நீ குழந்தைக்கு சோறூட்டும் அழகைக்கண்டு
மேகத்தினுள் மறைந்து,வெண்ணிலவும் வெட்கப்படதடி.
கவித்துவம்
காதோரம் கருமயிர் காற்றடித்து
கன்னத்தில்விழ
கைவிரலால் களைந்து
கண்சிமிட்டும் கவின்காட்சியை
காணக் கண் கோடிவேண்டும்.
வெள்ளைப்பொய்
வேறொருத்திக்கு நான் எழுதிய கவிதையை படித்து
என் கன்னத்தில் குழி விழுமா? என்றாய்.
ஆம், என்று சொல்லி உன்னை சிரிக்கவைத்து
தேடினேன்.
உன் கன்னத்தில்.. குழி.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
The two faced coin
Thursday 17th March 2011, 7:03 pm
From : abhinaya.karthik@mailsnip.com
To : karthik.abhinaya@mailsnip.com
Subject : empty
Hi. Its high time we talked about stuff Karthik. I have certain things to share. I have been waiting for the right time and now I feel I should be telling all this, for I fear the right time may never come.
Thursday 17th March 2011 7:03 pm.
From : karthik.abhinaya@mailsnip.com
To : abhinaya.karthik@mailsnip.com
Subject : empty
Hello. Its high time we talked about stuff Abhi. I have certain things to share. I have been waiting for the perfect moment and now I feel I should be telling all this, for it may be too late.
I don't know how or where to start. I thought we'd go on without talking about this but its getting more and more burdensome. By the way did you check the bills that were on the dining table? Last night's pizza is in the fridge. Its been 17 hours since I left home. I don't know when I will be back.
Karthik, how could you do this to me? After all that happened. How? Do you even understand how I feel?
Abhi, how do you even do this to me? Do you feel the same way? I wish you go through this too.
Its suffocating Karthik. You know those times when you would go on and on and on? I wish you hadn't talked at all. Those times when I had to talk and keep waiting for your response. I wish I hadn't talked at all. Every time Karthik, every time. Whenever we danced I had to lead. Whenever we kissed I had to be the one who initiated. Come on! What were you even thinking? There are days when all I needed was a hug and a shoulder to cry. And all you would do was stand and stare. Like I conveyed nothing! What were you even thinking?
Its overwhelming Abhi. You know those times when I used to talk and you listen like a baby? I just loved how much you valued putting up with me. You know those moments you talk about everything under the sky? I wish I could make you feel how I feel at those moments. Whenever we danced I let you lead. I didn't attempt to kiss you whenever you didn't want to. I wanted to be different. I wanted to make you feel special. You remember those days when all I did was to sit and look at your face. Those moments were filled with silence but I believe those are the times when we had the deepest of conversations.
That cover full of stuff under the bed? What was that? It started stinking. I feel like I don't even know you anymore. Check if the maid had cleaned that. Fuck! Why am I even bothered about that house. I don't want to come back Karthik. It sucks to know that there's no other place to go.
I can't find the bouquet under the bed. So I assume you got it. Hope you liked the card too.
I don't even know why I'm mailing you all this. I tried telling all this to your face. Then I thought I should be talking to the same face that doesn't react at all.
I don't even know why I'm mailing all this. I would love to tell all this to you directly. But you render me speechless, every single time.
I wish I never get back home. I don't love you anymore Karthik. Bye.
Waiting for you to knock the door anytime. I love you Abhi, more than ever. Missing you. Bye.
Thursday March 17 2011 7.31 pm
The mail service provider was probably flipping a coin to decide whose heart to break first.
From : abhinaya.karthik@mailsnip.com
To : karthik.abhinaya@mailsnip.com
Subject : empty
Hi. Its high time we talked about stuff Karthik. I have certain things to share. I have been waiting for the right time and now I feel I should be telling all this, for I fear the right time may never come.
***
From : karthik.abhinaya@mailsnip.com
To : abhinaya.karthik@mailsnip.com
Subject : empty
Hello. Its high time we talked about stuff Abhi. I have certain things to share. I have been waiting for the perfect moment and now I feel I should be telling all this, for it may be too late.
***
I don't know how or where to start. I thought we'd go on without talking about this but its getting more and more burdensome. By the way did you check the bills that were on the dining table? Last night's pizza is in the fridge. Its been 17 hours since I left home. I don't know when I will be back.
***
I have so much to say and I am not sure where to begin. Its getting heavier by the day. I had the leftovers of last night's pizza. And the bills have been taken care of. I came back an hour ago. The trip was a success. I don't know when you will be back.
***
***
Abhi, how do you even do this to me? Do you feel the same way? I wish you go through this too.
***
Its suffocating Karthik. You know those times when you would go on and on and on? I wish you hadn't talked at all. Those times when I had to talk and keep waiting for your response. I wish I hadn't talked at all. Every time Karthik, every time. Whenever we danced I had to lead. Whenever we kissed I had to be the one who initiated. Come on! What were you even thinking? There are days when all I needed was a hug and a shoulder to cry. And all you would do was stand and stare. Like I conveyed nothing! What were you even thinking?
***
Its overwhelming Abhi. You know those times when I used to talk and you listen like a baby? I just loved how much you valued putting up with me. You know those moments you talk about everything under the sky? I wish I could make you feel how I feel at those moments. Whenever we danced I let you lead. I didn't attempt to kiss you whenever you didn't want to. I wanted to be different. I wanted to make you feel special. You remember those days when all I did was to sit and look at your face. Those moments were filled with silence but I believe those are the times when we had the deepest of conversations.
***
That cover full of stuff under the bed? What was that? It started stinking. I feel like I don't even know you anymore. Check if the maid had cleaned that. Fuck! Why am I even bothered about that house. I don't want to come back Karthik. It sucks to know that there's no other place to go.
***
I can't find the bouquet under the bed. So I assume you got it. Hope you liked the card too.
***
I don't even know why I'm mailing you all this. I tried telling all this to your face. Then I thought I should be talking to the same face that doesn't react at all.
***
I don't even know why I'm mailing all this. I would love to tell all this to you directly. But you render me speechless, every single time.
***
I wish I never get back home. I don't love you anymore Karthik. Bye.
***
Waiting for you to knock the door anytime. I love you Abhi, more than ever. Missing you. Bye.
**************
Thursday March 17 2011 7.31 pm
The mail service provider was probably flipping a coin to decide whose heart to break first.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
A little bit of truth
This is not some lame attempt at sweeping you off your feet. If I could've I would've.
You,
Yes, you. I sincerely hope you are reading this. This is the first time I'm writing to you and I really wish this is the last time too. Yes, its been too much of a burden to carry and walk around. And it tires me. Its hard. You wouldn't know. Do you? Don't surprise me by saying yes. As I hear, you know what I think of you. Or as I would like to put it 'thought' of you. It was hard to type it in the past tense but what the hell? Am putting an end to it tonight. You grew in me like so badly. There have been several good memories which, you probably forgot or worst case you never knew they existed. Who would remember asking some ridiculous physics formula to some stranger? Well, I do. Ah, chuck it. People would probably go 'Awww sweet' but yeah, it doesn't matter. Not anymore to me, just like it never mattered to you. Its been a terrible 5 months and I must thank you for all the good memories. I'm sorry you might be the subject of a million stories I might write in the future, just like how you were a part of a few that I had already written. I made plans of asking you out and all that. Very funny when I come to think of it now. Very funny. Its like a very bad probability problem that remained unsolved. 1, .95 and it went on towards zero and just to give me a little ego boost I'll consider myself worthy of a 0.25 probability of being the one, alright? Just play along. Life works in strange ways, the six degrees of separation and all. So there's always a mighty chance of running into you at weddings or someplace else. I'd be skipping a beat even then just like how it happens(d) every time. Now listen, I'm all done. I wouldn't have written all this but this is what a sleep deprived exam facing 19 year old guy does at 3 am in the morning. So yeah, I'm over you. It took me 3 minutes to type the last sentence. But there, I did it. Listen, I'll never be able to ask you out even if I wanted to. You're a tinge way too awesome for me. So calm down. Don't freak out. I still kind of like you, savoring this for the bed time stories I might get to tell my kids. I want to end this, I can sense you're getting bored. So yeah, continue staying awesome. Go, be a good girl :)
Me.
Me.
 |
| Let go |
Again, This is not some lame attempt at sweeping you off your feet. If I could've I would've.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Christmas
There were smiles all around. Knee deep snow, yet people were out of their houses very early. Everyone was busy shopping. It was Christmas eve.
She was extra happy. She had a wide smile. As wide as a moon pie. She blushed at the very thought of it. He calls her that, yes, a moon pie. She walked through the crowded street hoping that none noticed her red cheeks and ears. She was so excited about this Christmas, it was their first Christmas together.
She put a lot of thought in buying a gift for him. She wanted to give him something that he'll always remember. Of course she knew he's going to remember whatever the gift might be, she wanted it to be something sweet. She peeped into every single shop she passed by. She had a few hours left till she began her surprise trip to his place.
Oh yes, you people are not familiar with these two, are you? So here it goes. They met roughly ten months back. He works in a firm about two hundred miles from where she stays. The charm of their love for each other kept the relationship going. It was time they realised they were made for each other.
Coming back, she was all burned out and tired of searching and hence she thought she'd take a break and get done with lunch. She was looking at her mobile and was lost in thoughts. She was done with her lunch and when she came out of the restaurant she knew what she was going to get him.
The sun had set and she set out on her journey. A long, tiresome drive. But what the hell, its him.
She finally reached. She had a wider smile. Only to be disappointed to see a post it stuck on his door. "Away for the weekend, Merry Christmas :) "
She never had a plan B. She wanted to surprise him and now it seemed life had played a cruel trick. She called him on his phone.
"Hey" she started.
"HEY" he was full of energy.
"Where the hell are you? I'm at your door and you are not here" she almost started crying.
"Oh now I know why your door is locked" said he.
Silence. And more silence. The gods were smiling and somewhere a guy and a girl exchanged I love yous.
The clock struck twelve. And they wished each other "Merry Christmas"
He sang for her, a song that he'd written for her.
"The grass are all wet, cold and full of dew,
All I wanted for Christmas was you"
:)
She was extra happy. She had a wide smile. As wide as a moon pie. She blushed at the very thought of it. He calls her that, yes, a moon pie. She walked through the crowded street hoping that none noticed her red cheeks and ears. She was so excited about this Christmas, it was their first Christmas together.
She put a lot of thought in buying a gift for him. She wanted to give him something that he'll always remember. Of course she knew he's going to remember whatever the gift might be, she wanted it to be something sweet. She peeped into every single shop she passed by. She had a few hours left till she began her surprise trip to his place.
Oh yes, you people are not familiar with these two, are you? So here it goes. They met roughly ten months back. He works in a firm about two hundred miles from where she stays. The charm of their love for each other kept the relationship going. It was time they realised they were made for each other.
Coming back, she was all burned out and tired of searching and hence she thought she'd take a break and get done with lunch. She was looking at her mobile and was lost in thoughts. She was done with her lunch and when she came out of the restaurant she knew what she was going to get him.
The sun had set and she set out on her journey. A long, tiresome drive. But what the hell, its him.
She finally reached. She had a wider smile. Only to be disappointed to see a post it stuck on his door. "Away for the weekend, Merry Christmas :) "
She never had a plan B. She wanted to surprise him and now it seemed life had played a cruel trick. She called him on his phone.
"Hey" she started.
"HEY" he was full of energy.
"Where the hell are you? I'm at your door and you are not here" she almost started crying.
"Oh now I know why your door is locked" said he.
Silence. And more silence. The gods were smiling and somewhere a guy and a girl exchanged I love yous.
The clock struck twelve. And they wished each other "Merry Christmas"
He sang for her, a song that he'd written for her.
"The grass are all wet, cold and full of dew,
All I wanted for Christmas was you"
:)
Thursday, April 21, 2011
My little girl
It was an ordinary day. Cars moved, men and women woke up and went to work, children went to school, stocks crashed, flights took off, birds sang, flowers blossomed and fruits ripened.
He did not feel ordinary. He had the widest smile, tears were running down his cheeks. He was holding her in his hands. His own, his daughter.
6 months:
She was smiling at anyone she could spot. He came near her. Tickled her, turned her smile into an hiccuped laughter that made his day. She made a faint sound. Opened her mouth in a small 'O' and tried to imitate him as he was speaking to her. A muffled 'Pa' came out of it. He couldn't sleep that night.
4 years:
It was July and the rains were slashing hard. He was sitting next to her by the bed. She was shivering beneath the blankets. His hands could not keep her warm. Her temperature was shooting up every fifteen minutes. The doctor had promised to come as soon as he could. He was cursing the none in particular for having spared him and decided to hurt his daughter. The doctor arrived. It took three days for her to return back to normal. Three of the longest days he was ever through. On the third day, she held her hands and smiled. That moment he knew he'd never leave that hand.
7 years:
They were walking through the market. She suddenly stopped by a window. A teddy bear, pink in colour. All that she wanted was that and he couldn't get her. He promised her "I 'll buy you everything in here someday" Another sleepless night for him. He was the reason she cried, he was the reason she didn't smile.
10 years:
He used to take her for walks after dinner everyday. That was a busy neighborhood. He had plenty of stuff to tell her everyday. They discussed his work, her school, his colleagues, her friends. They were yet another dad-daughter one will find but in the world of theirs there were only two people and they had each other.
She used to run with him, walk on the side of the road where he wouldn't want her to. He'll chase her and persuade her to walk on the safer side. She'd smile, laugh and ultimately refuse.
He'd tilt his head, smile at her and say, "We can't play catch on the road" She'd retort back saying, "Yes we can"
Yes we can, three words to hear which he'd climb a million mountains and swim through a thousand seas.
12 years:
His daughter was not a 4 year old anymore. He had to make his stories less sillier. She started asking questions. She was growing up. She was making him proud. While being daddy's little girl all the while.
16 years:
It was her birthday. Her day. Her dad wasn't home yet. It was late in the evening. The phone bell rang. It was her dad. He asked her to check if there was a file on his table. Before she could answer the line got cut. She went into his room only to find it filled with all the things that she asked for when she was 10. The teddy bear was beaming at her from his desk. He had kept his promise.
25 years:
He was struck by pneumonia. The doctors lost hope. She was sitting next to him, holding his hands. He tried speaking, his voice was faint. He had a few minutes to say what she meant to him. It was like asking you to describe every beautiful thing on earth.
"I won't be able to get you gifts for your next birthday. I'm leaving you with the hope that I have given you all that you asked for. But what's so painful is deep in my heart I know that even too much is not good enough for you, my princess. My little girl"
:)
PS: Thanks to blog adda this post got picked as one of the spicy saturday picks :)
He did not feel ordinary. He had the widest smile, tears were running down his cheeks. He was holding her in his hands. His own, his daughter.
6 months:
She was smiling at anyone she could spot. He came near her. Tickled her, turned her smile into an hiccuped laughter that made his day. She made a faint sound. Opened her mouth in a small 'O' and tried to imitate him as he was speaking to her. A muffled 'Pa' came out of it. He couldn't sleep that night.
4 years:
It was July and the rains were slashing hard. He was sitting next to her by the bed. She was shivering beneath the blankets. His hands could not keep her warm. Her temperature was shooting up every fifteen minutes. The doctor had promised to come as soon as he could. He was cursing the none in particular for having spared him and decided to hurt his daughter. The doctor arrived. It took three days for her to return back to normal. Three of the longest days he was ever through. On the third day, she held her hands and smiled. That moment he knew he'd never leave that hand.
7 years:
They were walking through the market. She suddenly stopped by a window. A teddy bear, pink in colour. All that she wanted was that and he couldn't get her. He promised her "I 'll buy you everything in here someday" Another sleepless night for him. He was the reason she cried, he was the reason she didn't smile.
10 years:
He used to take her for walks after dinner everyday. That was a busy neighborhood. He had plenty of stuff to tell her everyday. They discussed his work, her school, his colleagues, her friends. They were yet another dad-daughter one will find but in the world of theirs there were only two people and they had each other.
She used to run with him, walk on the side of the road where he wouldn't want her to. He'll chase her and persuade her to walk on the safer side. She'd smile, laugh and ultimately refuse.
He'd tilt his head, smile at her and say, "We can't play catch on the road" She'd retort back saying, "Yes we can"
Yes we can, three words to hear which he'd climb a million mountains and swim through a thousand seas.
12 years:
His daughter was not a 4 year old anymore. He had to make his stories less sillier. She started asking questions. She was growing up. She was making him proud. While being daddy's little girl all the while.
16 years:
It was her birthday. Her day. Her dad wasn't home yet. It was late in the evening. The phone bell rang. It was her dad. He asked her to check if there was a file on his table. Before she could answer the line got cut. She went into his room only to find it filled with all the things that she asked for when she was 10. The teddy bear was beaming at her from his desk. He had kept his promise.
25 years:
He was struck by pneumonia. The doctors lost hope. She was sitting next to him, holding his hands. He tried speaking, his voice was faint. He had a few minutes to say what she meant to him. It was like asking you to describe every beautiful thing on earth.
"I won't be able to get you gifts for your next birthday. I'm leaving you with the hope that I have given you all that you asked for. But what's so painful is deep in my heart I know that even too much is not good enough for you, my princess. My little girl"
:)
Sunday, March 13, 2011
When the dominoes started their fall..
Its sunday night. Some people are partying, some are cribbing about monday blues, some are preparing for math tests while in the eastern most part of our planet people are dying.I happened to read this post, The end of the world as I see it. Here I sit with a zillion questions about Nature and what a bitch it is proving itself to be.
I'm not blaming anyone in particular not that god person or whoever I must think to be responsible for. People are sympathising, praying and wishing nothing more should envisage Japan and its people while I sit here with a strange feeling which I guess is mostly guilt. Was discussing this with my friend, asking why should one country face repeated bashing while others are safe and sound cheering cricket. There might be kids and people of my age who are as entitled to life as much as I am but are crying out loud because they lost their mom,dad, siblings or a part of themselves. Is it fair? I asked this question so many times in the past two days that I lost count, "What kind of a design is this?"
My friend said there is no point in feeling guilty, mankind has been programmed to sympathise and do nothing but move on as there's nothing more one can do. Imagine this scenario, this might make you understand how I feel: The teacher is punishing that kid sitting in the first desk while you are in the last desk looking at him getting beaten with a cane all the while having the same unfinished homework in hand.
I do not wish to be Nostradamic and post my predictions as to how and when the world will end. In fact I don't believe in the 2012 crap myself. I can't help but think that there are people smiling and dancing while there are people drowning in misery. Its sad that I wait for Sachin to score a hundred while the Japanese are hiding their children from radiation. Imagine a kid born last week, which was the centre of attention and the reason for its family to smile, laughing and wetting the diapers knowing not that his mom and dad are crying all the while when they are trying not to wipe the smile away from his face. What if that's the last thing they ever see? Why should this happen? If all the world has to end let it end in a whisper. Why to show off?
Just because you can, you shouldn't, bitch.
The world needs love, spread it. Spread it wherever, whenever and however you can. And that love shall give the finger to whomever responsible.
I'm not blaming anyone in particular not that god person or whoever I must think to be responsible for. People are sympathising, praying and wishing nothing more should envisage Japan and its people while I sit here with a strange feeling which I guess is mostly guilt. Was discussing this with my friend, asking why should one country face repeated bashing while others are safe and sound cheering cricket. There might be kids and people of my age who are as entitled to life as much as I am but are crying out loud because they lost their mom,dad, siblings or a part of themselves. Is it fair? I asked this question so many times in the past two days that I lost count, "What kind of a design is this?"
My friend said there is no point in feeling guilty, mankind has been programmed to sympathise and do nothing but move on as there's nothing more one can do. Imagine this scenario, this might make you understand how I feel: The teacher is punishing that kid sitting in the first desk while you are in the last desk looking at him getting beaten with a cane all the while having the same unfinished homework in hand.
I do not wish to be Nostradamic and post my predictions as to how and when the world will end. In fact I don't believe in the 2012 crap myself. I can't help but think that there are people smiling and dancing while there are people drowning in misery. Its sad that I wait for Sachin to score a hundred while the Japanese are hiding their children from radiation. Imagine a kid born last week, which was the centre of attention and the reason for its family to smile, laughing and wetting the diapers knowing not that his mom and dad are crying all the while when they are trying not to wipe the smile away from his face. What if that's the last thing they ever see? Why should this happen? If all the world has to end let it end in a whisper. Why to show off?
Just because you can, you shouldn't, bitch.
The world needs love, spread it. Spread it wherever, whenever and however you can. And that love shall give the finger to whomever responsible.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
One thing off my bucket list :)
It all started in the first semester. Having heard that the college has a Theatre club I wanted to join that, not robotics or the computer society. I'm not boasting but its been a long time dream to act, rather learn to act and there I had a lovely opportunity and yes I grabbed it. There were auditions and yay I got in :D
January comes and everything begins to unfold slowly. Theatron Anna Univ, started off with the reading and then there came blocking ( yes, I can scene-potufy with technical terms) And we started rehearsals.Though I skipped like a zillion of them, I had the best time with the people there. We bonded easily and had way too much fun. Here is my look down the memory lane in no particular order:
Gokul: Such a fun guy. Being a final year he bonds amazingly with juniors, kudos for that. Coming to your character, THE LION :D :D :D He's the show's highlight. With the orange wig and the suit, he made us erupt with laughter everytime he came on stage :) You were the first guy i got introduced to in the group. You are a total win in whatever you do.
Vikram: Such a nice chap and a brilliant actor. Extremely dedicated. A great inspiration to everyone who acts along. And as Amitash says," None has to inspire you, you have to inspire yourself" Such actors are rare and you are the only one I personally know. Was a great pleasure knowing you and glad that I found a good friend in you. Hero :)
Amitash: Our director :) Just like how he scares the people in the team he decided to scare the crowd by playing a Ghost :D Extreme talent, great experience and it was a great privilege working under you :) May you reap success in whatever you do :)
Merwin: I don't know why but I see him as a brother since the initial days of Theatron (No ice vechufying, this is truth) There are really few people who are nice to everyone without any reason but just because they are nice. Merwin is one such guy. You are such a warm person and I really feel sad not to have known you earlier.
Prashanth, Nishok and Shyam: We share not just the scene but many moments together :) It was great fun spending time with you and these moments shall not be forgotten easily :) Hope we stay in touch.
Siona: Such an animated personality. Best person to have fun. I'd spend all day with you without getting bored :D Have I told you? You are my faaaaaaaavorite in the whole team :D I love you.
PS: Thanks for letting me play angry birds on your phone :D
Archna: Whatay voice man! You are soooo much fun. The way you mock Merwin and Sundaram haha, best moments. I'll never forget your "Lift up your puny orb" :D We shall have more fun in the next production.
Ayshwarya: The Mermaid :D It was great fun to see you, Archna and Siona mock Gomes and Sundharam :D. It takes courage to pull off such a role and you were brilliant :) Hope we get another chance to work together.
Vijay: Macha! Bandito! Jogehsty! Assistant Director! :D How do I call you? Semma fun chatting with you during rehearsals. The Bandit role can 't be pulled off by anyone except you. I'll never forget these moments spent in your company.
Sundharam: Whatay sacrifice you made for the role :P None can ever forget your mokkais Mr. Gym body. The amount of work you put into this production, massive! Take a bow :)
Anjana: Not to forget the lead "who blew fresh air into the play" as said by many. You are an amazing actress and I really wish I had seen your performance in Fire and the Rain. It was amazing spending time with you and hope we relive this during the next production.
Abi and Anu: I seriously can't recollect what all I spoke to who between the two of you. So here we go. The surprise element of our team :D The highlight scene and the way you built up to the show with a gazillion changes in dialogues and design. It was great working with you :)
Nivetha: We started speaking like during the very end of the production and you are TOTAL FUN. Wish I knew you earlier. You are electric I tell you :D Hope we work in the next production and I'm sure I'll have a blast.
Not to forget M.T and Advaith :) Great job guys.
I did not plan on writing a post like this till a few minutes back. I woke up and I felt so emotional after a long time. I seriously had tears, when we were huddling and giving hugs to each other before the show. I don't know if it was happiness, nervousness or the feeling that this day will never come again. It was such an emotional moment when we were holding hands for the prayer. I guess you all felt that too. Love you guys and I'd give anything to relive this one month that passed in a swish. Hope we all stay in touch for a long time to come. You guys who began with being a part of the crew I acted in, ended up becoming a part of my life. I found a friend, a really good one, in everyone of you. I'll miss you guys like crazy. We have one more show to do tonight and I will have the time of my life. I seriously need a hug right now. EVERY ONE OF YOU ARE SIMPLY AWESOME. I can't wait to start our next production :) And I really hope I'm a part of it.
This post means so much to me just as everyone of you :) You people have magic in you.
Loads of love.
Vi,vi,vi,vi... Vignesh :)
January comes and everything begins to unfold slowly. Theatron Anna Univ, started off with the reading and then there came blocking ( yes, I can scene-potufy with technical terms) And we started rehearsals.Though I skipped like a zillion of them, I had the best time with the people there. We bonded easily and had way too much fun. Here is my look down the memory lane in no particular order:
Gokul: Such a fun guy. Being a final year he bonds amazingly with juniors, kudos for that. Coming to your character, THE LION :D :D :D He's the show's highlight. With the orange wig and the suit, he made us erupt with laughter everytime he came on stage :) You were the first guy i got introduced to in the group. You are a total win in whatever you do.
Vikram: Such a nice chap and a brilliant actor. Extremely dedicated. A great inspiration to everyone who acts along. And as Amitash says," None has to inspire you, you have to inspire yourself" Such actors are rare and you are the only one I personally know. Was a great pleasure knowing you and glad that I found a good friend in you. Hero :)
Amitash: Our director :) Just like how he scares the people in the team he decided to scare the crowd by playing a Ghost :D Extreme talent, great experience and it was a great privilege working under you :) May you reap success in whatever you do :)
Merwin: I don't know why but I see him as a brother since the initial days of Theatron (No ice vechufying, this is truth) There are really few people who are nice to everyone without any reason but just because they are nice. Merwin is one such guy. You are such a warm person and I really feel sad not to have known you earlier.
Prashanth, Nishok and Shyam: We share not just the scene but many moments together :) It was great fun spending time with you and these moments shall not be forgotten easily :) Hope we stay in touch.
Siona: Such an animated personality. Best person to have fun. I'd spend all day with you without getting bored :D Have I told you? You are my faaaaaaaavorite in the whole team :D I love you.
PS: Thanks for letting me play angry birds on your phone :D
Archna: Whatay voice man! You are soooo much fun. The way you mock Merwin and Sundaram haha, best moments. I'll never forget your "Lift up your puny orb" :D We shall have more fun in the next production.
Ayshwarya: The Mermaid :D It was great fun to see you, Archna and Siona mock Gomes and Sundharam :D. It takes courage to pull off such a role and you were brilliant :) Hope we get another chance to work together.
Vijay: Macha! Bandito! Jogehsty! Assistant Director! :D How do I call you? Semma fun chatting with you during rehearsals. The Bandit role can 't be pulled off by anyone except you. I'll never forget these moments spent in your company.
Sundharam: Whatay sacrifice you made for the role :P None can ever forget your mokkais Mr. Gym body. The amount of work you put into this production, massive! Take a bow :)
Anjana: Not to forget the lead "who blew fresh air into the play" as said by many. You are an amazing actress and I really wish I had seen your performance in Fire and the Rain. It was amazing spending time with you and hope we relive this during the next production.
Abi and Anu: I seriously can't recollect what all I spoke to who between the two of you. So here we go. The surprise element of our team :D The highlight scene and the way you built up to the show with a gazillion changes in dialogues and design. It was great working with you :)
Nivetha: We started speaking like during the very end of the production and you are TOTAL FUN. Wish I knew you earlier. You are electric I tell you :D Hope we work in the next production and I'm sure I'll have a blast.
Not to forget M.T and Advaith :) Great job guys.
I did not plan on writing a post like this till a few minutes back. I woke up and I felt so emotional after a long time. I seriously had tears, when we were huddling and giving hugs to each other before the show. I don't know if it was happiness, nervousness or the feeling that this day will never come again. It was such an emotional moment when we were holding hands for the prayer. I guess you all felt that too. Love you guys and I'd give anything to relive this one month that passed in a swish. Hope we all stay in touch for a long time to come. You guys who began with being a part of the crew I acted in, ended up becoming a part of my life. I found a friend, a really good one, in everyone of you. I'll miss you guys like crazy. We have one more show to do tonight and I will have the time of my life. I seriously need a hug right now. EVERY ONE OF YOU ARE SIMPLY AWESOME. I can't wait to start our next production :) And I really hope I'm a part of it.
This post means so much to me just as everyone of you :) You people have magic in you.
Loads of love.
Vi,vi,vi,vi... Vignesh :)
Saturday, January 8, 2011
The man in the mirror
The author may or may not be drunk, this may or may not be fictional and you may or may not continue reading any further.People who cannot read English in Tamil and Tamil in English, please to learn before you continue reading this.
Macha, there's this ponnu da. I know here for like a few days, lets not say 5 months. shhhh. She is mad about me. Haha impossible no? Brilliant macha you are. I am mad about her, hmm not really but we'll assume so. You know what the problem is? Let me tell you. I speak to her da, say Hi how are you and all that. Not like I say to others macha, I say hi beacuse she waves back beautifully. I'll show you someday, no no I won't. See, like this only, like this she waves back at me. I say hi and I wait macha. I wouldn't know what to ask next. If I ask how are you she'd say you asked me the same thing when you saw me yesterday, no? Correct macha, girls get bored soon. You know what girls get bored of me soon da. Guess why? I get bored of them too. Sweet, no? Life's x^2+y^=r^2 macha. That math teacher no? Kannadi female. She said that wrongly, so funny it was. Coming back, she waves back subtly da. Also when I ask how are you I care to know macha. I don't remember what I had for breakfast, but i still remember that green color dress she wore on that day, no don say it was that physics test. shhhh. And thats all, my creativity ends. Evlo I write here? But then I'm on my highest mokka point when I'm around her macha. Crazy no? You know what the sad part is? This guy, no? He fell in love badly with that girl and now he is telling his story to us haha. Thevaya for him all this? He doesn't even know to say it out da. Worst no? We've watched so many movies together but then adhellam impossible da. Its been long since he met her even. He got busy, no no she got busy, wait where's he? Ok let me continue. I got busy with classes and so couldn't meet her da. Its hard macha also it hurts to think of getting over it macha. Trust me, getting over is not like a hangover macha, its ten times, no twenty times worse than that. Thalavali da. You wouldn't know. Waste fellow you are. Wait let me get up. Here he is. What he did no? He felt shy, probably not brave enough. He thinks he's worthless macha. Hey? Where are you? Forget him. Velaikagadha payan da. I'll tell you, I found it hard to tell her da and now I can see I lost her. Not to someone else macha, but I simply lost her. Why? Hello? Hey ? Oh no,power cut. Where are you? hello?
Damn you! Man in the mirror.
Probably the worst post ever, still. Thanks for having read through. I haven't gained enough drinking experience to simulate, though, Vaazhga Tamil cinema for having taught me this.
Macha, there's this ponnu da. I know here for like a few days, lets not say 5 months. shhhh. She is mad about me. Haha impossible no? Brilliant macha you are. I am mad about her, hmm not really but we'll assume so. You know what the problem is? Let me tell you. I speak to her da, say Hi how are you and all that. Not like I say to others macha, I say hi beacuse she waves back beautifully. I'll show you someday, no no I won't. See, like this only, like this she waves back at me. I say hi and I wait macha. I wouldn't know what to ask next. If I ask how are you she'd say you asked me the same thing when you saw me yesterday, no? Correct macha, girls get bored soon. You know what girls get bored of me soon da. Guess why? I get bored of them too. Sweet, no? Life's x^2+y^=r^2 macha. That math teacher no? Kannadi female. She said that wrongly, so funny it was. Coming back, she waves back subtly da. Also when I ask how are you I care to know macha. I don't remember what I had for breakfast, but i still remember that green color dress she wore on that day, no don say it was that physics test. shhhh. And thats all, my creativity ends. Evlo I write here? But then I'm on my highest mokka point when I'm around her macha. Crazy no? You know what the sad part is? This guy, no? He fell in love badly with that girl and now he is telling his story to us haha. Thevaya for him all this? He doesn't even know to say it out da. Worst no? We've watched so many movies together but then adhellam impossible da. Its been long since he met her even. He got busy, no no she got busy, wait where's he? Ok let me continue. I got busy with classes and so couldn't meet her da. Its hard macha also it hurts to think of getting over it macha. Trust me, getting over is not like a hangover macha, its ten times, no twenty times worse than that. Thalavali da. You wouldn't know. Waste fellow you are. Wait let me get up. Here he is. What he did no? He felt shy, probably not brave enough. He thinks he's worthless macha. Hey? Where are you? Forget him. Velaikagadha payan da. I'll tell you, I found it hard to tell her da and now I can see I lost her. Not to someone else macha, but I simply lost her. Why? Hello? Hey ? Oh no,power cut. Where are you? hello?
Damn you! Man in the mirror.
Probably the worst post ever, still. Thanks for having read through. I haven't gained enough drinking experience to simulate, though, Vaazhga Tamil cinema for having taught me this.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
கிறுக்கல்கள்
தமிழ் கவிதை கைக்குழந்தைப்போன்றது
எவன் வரைந்தாலும் படிக்க இனிமையாகவே இருக்கும் என்பதை உறுதியாக நம்பும் காரணத்தாலேயே நானும் எப்போதெல்லாம் தோன்றுகிறதோகவிதை எழுத முனைகிறேன்
பல மோசமான, மொக்கையான கவிதைகளுக்கு இடையே சில வரிகள் திரும்பப்படிக்கும் அளவுக்கு அழகாய் அமைந்து விடுகின்றன.இருட்டில் தான் வெளிச்சத்தின் அருமை புலப்படும் அல்லவா? எனவே அவ்வாறான உளறல்களும் அழகான சில கிறுக்கல்களும்
இங்கே
மெகா சீரியல்
தொலைக்கட்சியில் அவளுக்கு சுகப்ப்ரசவமானதா
என்று நகம் கடித்துப் பார்த்துக்கொண்டிருந்தாள்,
தொட்டிலில் குழந்தை அழுது கொண்டிருந்தது
விதி
ஜாதிக்கலவரத்தில் மூவர் மரணம்,
சந்நிதி தெருவில் காவல் அதிகரிப்பு
பார்த்திபன் கனவு
பட்டம் வாங்கிக்கொண்டிருக்கும் மகனின் கனவை கலைத்தது
"விடிஞ்சாச்சுடா வயலுக்கு போ" என்ற தாயின் குரல்
வாழ்கை
கீழே விழுந்த முறுக்கை எடுக்காதே என்றாள் மகனிடம்
அவளுக்கும் தெரிந்திருந்தது போலும்
மூன்றடி தள்ளி நடந்து வரும் பிச்சைக்காரனின் கடைசி மகனுக்கு
முருக்கென்றால் உயிர் என்று.
எதிர்காலம்
பச்சையாக இருப்பது வயல்,
அருகில் ஓடுவதுதான் ஆறு.
மகனுக்கு புத்தகம் பார்த்து கற்றுக்கொடுத்தான்
வருடம் 2050௦.
கருப்பு
கருப்பு, ஆகாத வண்ணமாம்
குருடனுக்கும் விளங்குவதாலோ?
தானம்
வலது கை கொடுப்பது இடதுகைக்கு தெரியக்கூடாதாம்
ஒரு கை உள்ளவனெல்லாம் தானம் வாங்குபவனாகவே உள்ளான்
படிப்பு
தேர்வுக்கு படிக்கவேண்டும் ஆறு மணிக்கு எழுப்பு
என்று ஆறு வயது வேலைக்காரனிடம் சொல்லிவிட்டு உறங்க சென்றான்
மேதாவி
இலக்கியம் படித்த தமிழாசிரியர்
இலக்கணம் சொல்லிகொண்டிருந்தார்
எடுத்துக்காட்டாக, விவசாயியின் நாட்டுப்புறப்பாடல்.
முத்தம்
ஒரே மூச்சில் அவன் காதலுக்கு பதில் கூறினாள்,
முதல் முத்தம்.
பிரிவு
சேர முடியாமல் தற்கொலை செய்து கொண்ட காதலர்களின்
கதை பேசிக்கொண்டிருந்தன
சேரவே முடியாத தண்டவாளங்கள்
பக்தி
நீ கோவிலுக்குப்போகும் அந்த அரை மணி
நாத்திகனும் ஆத்திகன் ஆவான்.
எவன் வரைந்தாலும் படிக்க இனிமையாகவே இருக்கும் என்பதை உறுதியாக நம்பும் காரணத்தாலேயே நானும் எப்போதெல்லாம் தோன்றுகிறதோ
பல மோசமான, மொக்கையான கவிதைகளுக்கு இடையே சில வரிகள் திரும்பப்படிக்கும் அளவுக்கு அழகாய் அமைந்து விடுகின்றன.இருட்டில் தான் வெளிச்சத்தின் அருமை புலப்படும் அல்லவா? எனவே அவ்வாறான உளறல்களும் அழகான சில கிறுக்கல்களும்
இங்கே
தொலைக்கட்சியில் அவளுக்கு சுகப்ப்ரசவமானதா
என்று நகம் கடித்துப் பார்த்துக்கொண்டிருந்தாள்,
தொட்டிலில் குழந்தை அழுது கொண்டிருந்தது
விதி
ஜாதிக்கலவரத்தில் மூவர் மரணம்,
சந்நிதி தெருவில் காவல் அதிகரிப்பு
பார்த்திபன் கனவு
பட்டம் வாங்கிக்கொண்டிருக்கும் மகனின் கனவை கலைத்தது
"விடிஞ்சாச்சுடா வயலுக்கு போ" என்ற தாயின் குரல்
வாழ்கை
கீழே விழுந்த முறுக்கை எடுக்காதே என்றாள் மகனிடம்
அவளுக்கும் தெரிந்திருந்தது போலும்
மூன்றடி தள்ளி நடந்து வரும் பிச்சைக்காரனின் கடைசி மகனுக்கு
முருக்கென்றால் உயிர் என்று.
எதிர்காலம்
பச்சையாக இருப்பது வயல்,
அருகில் ஓடுவதுதான் ஆறு.
மகனுக்கு புத்தகம் பார்த்து கற்றுக்கொடுத்தான்
வருடம் 2050௦.
கருப்பு
கருப்பு, ஆகாத வண்ணமாம்
குருடனுக்கும் விளங்குவதாலோ?
வலது கை கொடுப்பது இடதுகைக்கு தெரியக்கூடாதாம்
ஒரு கை உள்ளவனெல்லாம் தானம் வாங்குபவனாகவே உள்ளான்
படிப்பு
தேர்வுக்கு படிக்கவேண்டும் ஆறு மணிக்கு எழுப்பு
என்று ஆறு வயது வேலைக்காரனிடம் சொல்லிவிட்டு உறங்க சென்றான்
மேதாவி
இலக்கியம் படித்த தமிழாசிரியர்
இலக்கணம் சொல்லிகொண்டிருந்தார்
எடுத்துக்காட்டாக, விவசாயியின் நாட்டுப்புறப்பாடல்.
முத்தம்
ஒரே மூச்சில் அவன் காதலுக்கு பதில் கூறினாள்,
முதல் முத்தம்.
பிரிவு
சேர முடியாமல் தற்கொலை செய்து கொண்ட காதலர்களின்
கதை பேசிக்கொண்டிருந்தன
சேரவே முடியாத தண்டவாளங்கள்
பக்தி
நீ கோவிலுக்குப்போகும் அந்த அரை மணி
நாத்திகனும் ஆத்திகன் ஆவான்.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Crushed.. 2.0
On an evening when it began to rain,
I tried to rhyme and ended up in vain,
Not so easy when I'm in pain,
I think of you and miss my train.
Snail-like you crawled into me,
Hell and heaven together do I see.
Always tried to give you a hint,
Ridiculous, you never got what I meant.
Moon, Sun and the stars seem old,
I went to have my fortune told.
Love me and I'll shower you with gold,
Although its hot I feel so cold.
Deep in my heart you left a mark,
Which by the way is your new home.
Even in daylight I stay in the dark,
Just because YOU're my glowworm.
Thinking of you makes me feel so warm,
And time's proved again you're cheesecharmer's charm.
She is my drug.
I forgot the very next line,
Scribbled in a paper rug.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Crushed..
The author is outstandingly overconfident and is of the opinion that anything that rhymes is poetry. He's one among the only person who sports such a view and it doesn't make a difference
My days were long and blue,
Without anything new, Until I had a view.
Of an incredible you.
Seasons do change when I,
Happen to see you smile,
Always be the same,
Red apple of my eye.
Mad about you and blind with love,
Inside my heart I protect you with a glove.
Liar not I am neither do I mean any harm,
As time's proved you're cheescharmer's charm.
All I want to do,
Is convey this message,
Nothing can keep it due,
Even limited usage.
I fall in love everytime you brush you hair aside
And I follow you like the rats did pied.
I stutter and my tongue gets tied,
And all I want is you as my bride .
Is this just a crush
I don't think it is,
But you make me speak to my brush,
While i'm crazy as it is.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Soul mate
I have always loved you,
Be it day or night
My mom simply complains
That you look blue.
I was so proud
To show you around
To envy people
And climb to the ninth cloud.
Seven days a week
Thirty days a month
All through the day
You never turned weak.
One fine morning
My mom gave a warning
But I always wished
You stay my jeans that remains unwashed..
Be it day or night
My mom simply complains
That you look blue.
I was so proud
To show you around
To envy people
And climb to the ninth cloud.
Seven days a week
Thirty days a month
All through the day
You never turned weak.
One fine morning
My mom gave a warning
But I always wished
You stay my jeans that remains unwashed..
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Wake up and break up..
A dozen n half years back,
In summer when hot is the sun.
To my mom and dad's luck,
They got a son..
The very same year,
In a land far away from the Nile.
Your parents shed a happy tear,
Just to see you smile..
You were slim not stout,
And you stole my heart.
I asked you out,
You said why not..
You and me were Cupid's match,
Held each other as apple of the eye.
So many eyes did we catch,
Like bread,butter and sweet cherry pie..
Many a fight and chocolate snatches,
You and me never made patches.
Know whats funny?
That which people call life.
The weather's really hot and sunny,
Yet you never can be my wife..
Monday, September 13, 2010
Jaane tu ya Jaane na..
I'm sorry :( I really wanted to wish you at twelve.I should've slept around eleven thirty I guess,was awake till then.. i really wanted to wish you both.Woke up at two,shouted like anything at mom for not waking me up by twelve.Started crying badly.. Called you several times :( She picked but i guess you slept.. feeling so bad..Sorry da.. I did not forget n all.. :(
Loveee you..
He was smiling.A single tear left his eye.Took his mobile to text her.
"Was reading your letter. :) :) :) "
Immediate reply
"Which one? "
"The one you wrote after having forgotten my b'day :D"
"Ohhhh! That one :(. You forgot mine the same year!! :@"
I have always wanted to write about you.Still,I couldn't keep my promise of writing a testimonial on orkut :D My orkut days are over so now here comes something for you.
It was 11th June 2007 when you came to your new school.Somehow I manage to remember the date,so that whenever I tell that to you I get an " Awww, how sweet ;) "
So I don't really remember how we became friends bla bla bla.. but then we were Solid.Intricate bond of friendship that takes years to form.Glad that we became friends.And even more glad that we continue to remain so.
So many fights,silly and meaningless ones.That particular fight which you claim as the worst in our History :P. Loved each and every moment spent in your company.Those days where we used to speak on phone almost everyday. And not receiving a phone call meant you were angry on me or worst case everyone at home were angry on you :D
Days when we do nothing but cry on phone.Hell,I brokedown easily when you did horrible stuff,like speaking to another guy for example.Even today I have a problem with that but its the other way round.Today I make YOU cry muhahahaha :D
And those million chocolates we shared!! Wrappers that i cared to save ;) Those small letters you wrote with pencils,pens and most of all cute smileys [ :) ;) :( :'( ]
And my first b'day gift :) I owe you one :P I stopped celebrating birthdays since I started spelling birthday correctly :D And i got gifts from you after a long long time :)
I bet you'll read this say "Ok,But did not like much =/ "
Still I can't find someplace else to post things like this :D
Long since i wrote anything and this is the first time i write about you :)
And.....Finally
"Jaaanne tuuu yaaa Jaaaaane naa..
Maaanee tuuu yaaa maaane naaaaaa " :) :) :) :)
Loads of love.. :)
Loveee you..
He was smiling.A single tear left his eye.Took his mobile to text her.
"Was reading your letter. :) :) :) "
Immediate reply
"Which one? "
"The one you wrote after having forgotten my b'day :D"
"Ohhhh! That one :(. You forgot mine the same year!! :@"
I have always wanted to write about you.Still,I couldn't keep my promise of writing a testimonial on orkut :D My orkut days are over so now here comes something for you.
It was 11th June 2007 when you came to your new school.Somehow I manage to remember the date,so that whenever I tell that to you I get an " Awww, how sweet ;) "
So I don't really remember how we became friends bla bla bla.. but then we were Solid.Intricate bond of friendship that takes years to form.Glad that we became friends.And even more glad that we continue to remain so.
So many fights,silly and meaningless ones.That particular fight which you claim as the worst in our History :P. Loved each and every moment spent in your company.Those days where we used to speak on phone almost everyday. And not receiving a phone call meant you were angry on me or worst case everyone at home were angry on you :D
Days when we do nothing but cry on phone.Hell,I brokedown easily when you did horrible stuff,like speaking to another guy for example.Even today I have a problem with that but its the other way round.Today I make YOU cry muhahahaha :D
And those million chocolates we shared!! Wrappers that i cared to save ;) Those small letters you wrote with pencils,pens and most of all cute smileys [ :) ;) :( :'( ]
And my first b'day gift :) I owe you one :P I stopped celebrating birthdays since I started spelling birthday correctly :D And i got gifts from you after a long long time :)
I bet you'll read this say "Ok,But did not like much =/ "
Still I can't find someplace else to post things like this :D
Long since i wrote anything and this is the first time i write about you :)
And.....Finally
"Jaaanne tuuu yaaa Jaaaaane naa..
Maaanee tuuu yaaa maaane naaaaaa " :) :) :) :)
Loads of love.. :)
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