The dark side of Facebook

Everybody and their dog has an account on Facebook today. But do you take enough care to ensure that your data (photos, posts and the rest) remain as safe as possible?

Facebook as a social media platform serves more as a photo album for most people these days. But the sad part of all this is that people do not have control of what's posted on the internet. 

In the movie Social Network, Mark Zuckerberg's then girlfriend Erica Albright says

The internet's not written in pencil, its written in ink.

People should understand the seriousness of this point. When you post something on the internet, it is almost always impossible to remove all traces of it. Do a Google search of your name and see for yourself. 

Everyday I see so many people upload photos of everyday happenings. Men, women, dogs and cats alike. How secure are these photos? How much control do you have on who sees and doesn't get to see these photos? Not much. But you can ensure it is as safe as Facebook allows you to be. 

You ask me why you have to care about taking the effort to make changes to your privacy settings on Facebook?

Take a look at this page: One of the million ugly pages on Facebook This is just one of the so many pages that share photos of women that are publicly available on Facebook, rate them, discuss them and post obscene comments about the women whom they don't know all this without the knowledge of the respected girl. You could be happily uploading your picture showcasing the new pretty dress you bought for your birthday, which would then get shared across the world for perverted men to discuss things about you in public. Please go report abuse on that Facebook page, you'd be doing good to someone's sister/wife/girlfriend.


Try not to upload a lot of personal photographs. Getting 'likes' and comments praising you are of course internet validation metrics, but definitely not at this cost.

I'd like to list a few things that you can follow to ensure that your photos on Facebook are protected:


Use Facebook's privacy settings. They provide you with options to control right from the person who can message you to the persons whom you can completely block.

This can be found by clicking the 'lock icon' found in the top right corner of your Facebook page.  If you click 'Who can see my stuff?',  you'll see something like this:

Make sure you change the 'Who can see my future posts?' to 'Friends' or choose a list of people if you've created one such list already. If you click 'Use Activity Log' you can see what all you've done on Facebook. Right from the posts you 'liked', to the comments you posted and also the posts you hid from your timeline. This cannot be accessed by anyone but yourself, use this to check and monitor your own activity.


If you click 'Who can contact me?' you'll see something like this:

I suggest you choose the 'Strict filtering' option unless you care about messages from people you do not know. Also the second option helps you choose who can send friend requests to you.

If you want to block someone, make use of the third option. You'll see something like this:

If you click 'See more settings' you'll be taken to this window where you can alter setting concerning tags, posts, timeline and how others see your timeline.

SETTINGS SPECIFIC TO COVER PHOTOS AND DISPLAY PICTURES:


As a thumb rule, ask people before uploading their photos. Even if you're changing your display picture which has someone along with you (man, woman, dog, cat doesn't matter) ask them if they would mind. It is polite and would avoid unnecessary trouble.


Remember the following:

1) Your cover photos are ALWAYS PUBLIC. You are not allowed to change the visibility settings of your cover photos so as much as you can, ensure you don't upload photos of yourself or your friends which you do not want to be shared. 

2) Your CURRENT PROFILE PICTURE is PUBLIC. So when you upload a picture as your DP it is by default public. When you upload a new profile picture, you'll see something like this:

Instead of 'Friends' it will say 'Public'. Click on that to change it to 'Friends'. If you keep it as 'Friends of friends', people who are friends with your friends and are NOT your friend will be able to access it. As far as I know, even this is potentially dangerous.


I think everyone who uses Facebook must follow at least these basic steps to take care of their Facebook data, especially photos. Pass this to your friends and family so that they can avoid unnecessary trouble.

Ten Commandments for the Indian Engineering student

Are you an Engineering student in an Indian college? Don't worry even I had a bad day today.


So amidst all those 'cool' Facebook posts and funny satirical tweets that outrage on how the system should be and how everyone else is wrong, here are ten things you should always keep in mind. You are going to hate these. You have been warned.


1. You will get to interact with seniors in due course of your first year in college. You will carefully avoid those who are marching towards the library with books in hand and go disturb the one sitting with his girlfriend. He will ask you to 'chillax' and take things light. That's because he wants you to get lost and not disturb him. The right person to contact is the one with the books. He will provide you with the right advice. It will sound something like 'CGPA is important.'




2. In due course of time you will join/start ohmygodsofunny Facebook pages like 'Even-We-have -an-Engineering-college tips'. They will have coolmax posters that say stuff like develop your aptitude. Bunk classes. Have fun. But they miss some essential advice. CGPA is important.


3. You might be extremely interested in research. To the levels that you actually cultured ants for your sixth standard science project instead of saying they all died because your mom mistook it for Bournvita. So, you will end up doing tens of projects and millions of lines of code. While you are busy with all this you will grow up thinking you are superman. But CGPA is more important.


4. You will prepare with your fullest dedication to answer any question under the roof during the interview. But your preparation is not complete if you don't have a satisfactory answer to the question, "What is your CGPA?". Because CGPA is important.




5. Are you a programming wizard? Can you solve any problem in under 10 minutes? How many languages do you..? Wait, before that, What is your CGPA? Because, CGPA is more important.


6. You would have won gold medals in three consecutive math olympiads. But, CGPA is more important.


7. Your fellow classmate who asked you what is the difference between C and C++ two days before the test would get a Boston admit when some BPO would refuse to interview you. Because, CGPA is more important.


8. Your parents would think you are not working as much as your next door neighbor as he would end up with better grades because he 'refers' to Local authors only. Hey because at the end of the day, CGPA is more important.


9. You would think some basics on research and may be a paper would cover up for your drop in CGPA because you couldn't cut a pyramid into three equal parts. You will spend an hour filling your CV with accomplishments you think are going to make your profile look like Vidya Balan's gorgeous smile. But to start up with research and cover up CGPA you need a good CGPA. Because CGPA is more important.


10. You might choose to ignore all the above. But remember this alone, CGPA is important.

You wouldn't quite care even if I titled this as the next best thing to the next best thing you would ever come across

I'm screwed.
So are you.


There is never a  perfect day. There is never a perfect moment. You can plan a day only as much as you can plan your birth. At the end of the day nothing would have worked according to the plan. Not because your plan failed, but because others' succeeded too. 


Now is the right time. Never wait for the perfect wedding ring. It's not perfect because it's made of the purest gold or the best cut diamond. It's because it's you on the knees and she holding her hands out.

Tomorrow never arrives. Whatever that has to happen eventually gets lost in time. Lowering the temperature on the air conditioner today is not going to kill your neighbour tomorrow.

You do most things not because you like them but because they expect you to. You avoid certain things not because you dislike them but they are judgmental. Most of us die before we figure out who they are. The rest of us realise they were never real.

We are screwed.
So are they.   

Letters from nowhere

Most of the sanest conversations I have are with myself. It's a great joy when you get answers that help, opinions in your favour and appreciation for the most mediocre things that you perform. One can't expect others to do. Not even the best of friends will be able to give you a pat on the back for keeping your desk clean. Every man needs a Tyler Durden, someone within you, to guide, give constant feedback and to push you back up every time you fall down. I thought writing to myself would be fun, would be of help and would even make me feel better. So here,

Dearest me,

None would let you know the truth about yourself unless you stumble upon it by yourself. It's because the world is filled with two kinds of people. People who are very nice to point out the bad things in you and people who are not so nice to point out the good in you. So basically you have to find them yourself but since you are so busy concentrating on important issues like updating your Facebook status, I am here to save the trouble.

Life is not always fair as everyone around preaches. On the contrary it's mostly unfair to you. But the best part is that it's equally unfair to others as well. It never rains just on top of your head. If you get wet, so would the person standing next to you and the next.

None becomes a rocket scientist overnight. It's not like you should not try at all, but to expect immediate results for every action that your perform is natural but pointless. At the same time you shouldn't be investing your time and efforts on something that you know is not going to be fruitful. Like trying to grow apple trees in the Arctic. Remember, hope is the best thing. But it's not the only thing that's required.

You might fail, more than the number of times you would ever succeed. You should. Failure makes the success more dramatic and makes your celebrations better. Appreciate small successes like kicking the stone out of your way or making a baby smile. There are bad days, and then there are days which are worse. Somewhere in between you will have days that you would want to remember. Don't forget to recollect them. They say your entire life flashes before you just before you die. You must know where to fast forward and where to stop. 

Success stories are flawed. They are made to look like what they are today. It's like history. Most of it is too good to be true. None mentions how they met the right people at the right time. None mentions their inspirations. None EVER give out details of those people who gave them their million dollar idea. Success stories are made to inspire and they should end at that. You shouldn't follow anybody but yourself.

Ideal world exists only in philosophy and physics. You can't expect good deeds in return for good deeds. You shouldn't question them too. When you throw stones at a tree it gives you fruits. Do you ever question that? Then you shouldn't be complaining when you get stones in return for fruits.

In the end it all evens out. All you should look forward to in a day is one proper meal, a genuine smile, a hug and a good night's sleep.

Go live. Complaints are not those you would want to tell your kids and grand kids about. They must know that it would have been fun to have spent their lives with you when you were in your teens. You must live such that you have stories that make them smile and not complaints that make them feel bored. You have a whole life in front of you.

As one of your dearest friends said, "Today is the first day in the rest of your life." Don't let the tears blind you from the beautiful life that lay in front of you.

So long.

தமிழ் இனி மெல்லச்சாகும்.

புதிய நண்பர்களிடம், பழக ஆரமித்த சில நாட்களில் "தமிழ் படிக்க தெரியுமா?" என்று நான் கேட்பதுண்டு. பலரும் 'இல்லை' என்ற பதிலையே தருவார்கள். மற்றவர்கள் எழுத்து கூட்டி படிக்க நேரம் ஆகிறது. பேச தெரியும் ஆனா பள்ளியில் பிரெஞ்சு படிச்சேன் சமஸ்க்ரிதம் படிச்சேன் என்றெல்லாம் கூறுவது உண்டு. வேறு மொழி தெரிந்து கொள்வதில் தவறில்லை அதுக்காக தமிழ் நாட்டில் பிறந்து, வீட்டில் தமிழ் பேசி வளர்ந்துவிட்டு தமிழ் படிக்க தெரியாது என்று சொன்னால் வருத்தபடதான் முடிகின்றது என்னால்.


இன்றைய கட்டத்தில் நம்மில் யாரும் தமிழ் படிப்பதும் இல்லை, தமிழ் படிப்பதும் இல்லை. பல காரணங்கள் சொல்லலாம். அரசாங்கம் மிகச்சிறப்பாக தமிழ் வளர்க்கிறது. சோகம் என்னவென்றால் அது டில்லியில் மட்டுமே. சட்ட சபையில் சட்டை அவிழாமல் இருக்க தமிழைப்பற்றி பக்கம் பக்கமாக பேசுகின்றனர். நம்மூரில் தமிழ் மாநாடு என்று ஒன்றை நடத்தினார்கள். ரகுமான் இசை அமைத்த பாடலெல்லாம் வெளியிட்டார்கள். அரசாங்கம் மாறியது, முதல் குறிக்கோளாக அந்த மாநாட்டை மக்கள் மறக்க வேண்டும் என்பதைக்கொண்டு அதை பற்றி புத்தகத்தில்கூட இல்லாதவாறு செய்ய முயற்சிகள் நடந்து கொண்டிருக்கின்றன. வெற்றி தமிழக அரசுக்கு. தோல்வி தமிழுக்கு.

"என்னடா இவன் பெரிய திருவள்ளுவன் மாதிரி  தமிழ் தொண்டு பத்தி பேசறானே தமிழ் பாடத்தை எடுத்து படிக்க வேண்டியது தான?" என்று நீங்கள் கேட்பது வாஸ்தவம் தான். வயத்து பொழப்புன்னு ஒன்னு இருக்கே! தமிழை பாடமாக எடுத்து படிக்காவிட்டாலும் பொழுது போக்கிற்காக தமிழ் படிக்கலாமே? 

அனால் அதற்கும் வழி இல்லாமல் போனது. 

விழுக்காடு- என்ன அருமையான வார்த்தை. இந்த ஒரு வார்த்தை சொல்லிவிடும் ஒன்னாம் பகுப்பில் இருந்து பன்னிரெண்டாம் வகுப்பு வரை ஒரு மாணவன் எதற்காக வாழ்கையை செலவிடுகிறான் என்பதை. விழுக்காடு விழுக்காடு என்று மதிப்பென்னுக்க்காகவே வாழ்ந்து பாடம் படிக்கிறான். வாழ்க்கைப்பாடம் நடத்தும் தேர்வில் தோற்றுவிடுகிறான். பள்ளிக்கு பின் விழும் காட்டை தான் விழுக்காடு என்ற வார்த்தை அறிவுருத்துகிறதோ என்னவோ.

எட்டாம் வகுப்பு வரை தமிழ் கட்டாயமாக படிக்கவேண்டும் என்ற விதி கொண்டுவந்தார்கள்  அதையும் ஒழுங்க செஞ்சாங்களா? இல்ல. வள்ளுவனும் தொல்காப்பியரும் எழுதின பாடல்களுக்கு நடுவே "ஒவ்வொரு பூக்களுமே" னு சினிமா பாட்டு. அதுல இலக்கணமும்  தப்பு. கவிச்சுதந்திரம் னு மழுப்பிடுவாங்க. எட்டாவது படிக்கர பையனுக்கு தெரியுமா அதெல்லாம்? யோசனை என்பதையே மறந்தாச்சு.

கலப்புத்தமிழ் உணர்ந்து  திருத்தம் செய்க னு ஒரு பகுதி. ரெண்டு மார்க் வாங்கலாம். ரெண்டு மார்க் தான னு படிக்க முயற்சி கூட  செய்வதில்லை ஒருத்தனும். இப்படி இருந்தா தமிழ் எங்க வளரும்? 

தமிழ் பாடல்களில் தமிழை விட ஆங்கிலம் அதிகமாக உள்ளது. வயலின் னு ஒரு இசைக்கருவிய மறந்தே போயாச்சு. ஒன்னு குத்து பாட்டு இல்ல மேற்கத்திய இசை. கவிதை என்பது வேற ஒருவன் காதலிக்காக வடை மடிச்ச குமுதம் பேப்பர்ல பாத்து  சொல்றதோட முடிஞ்சு போச்சு. தமிழ் செய்தித்தாள் வாசிப்பது அவமானமாம். இதெல்லாம் யார் வளத்து விடறாங்கனு தெரியலை.

தெரிஞ்சே தான் சொன்னாங்க போல இருக்கு 

தமிழ் இனி மெல்லச்சாகும்.

Why success stories are inspirational

The web is full of videos and articles that narrate the success stories of great men and women who have been through a lifetime of troubles to reach the place they are at. And we, the not-yet-successful lot watch those million videos and think "where am I going wrong?" 

The answer is, nowhere. Those people did not know where they were right on the journey. They simply met the right people and took the right turns after learning that the other road hits a dead end. Success stories are framed, written and narrated in such a way that they seem like the product of all the misfortunes that ever happened. Success stories are exaggerations.  They seldom contain truth. These people try to connect the dots backwards. Every single person who says he failed in history at school coating it with humour would've cried for hours thinking "What am I going to be?" But today, all we know is that they did not care about failure and they kept working.

They say when Edison's dog screwed his works which were a product of weeks of hard work he didn't mind. He didn't shoot the dog because he was either insane or did not have a gun. Simple. When a pack of cards drop one worries about the falling card but not the one that is at the end of the row standing tall waiting for its fall. 

Success stories never guide you, all that they do is make you feel guilty. 'Chasing your dream' s the term every narrator uses. If only it was as easy as that. Half the scientists wanted to be cobblers. Some of the best economists started off college wanting to be home makers. Life is clueless and you fail more than you succeed. Only thing that was common to all successful people is the fact that they did not give up. They had 24 hours just like you and me, they decided to sleep less.

Remember, today's successful people are the ones who failed yesterday. 

Symbiosis.

The game of snooker has 15 balls and still needs a cue ball to direct them on to the pockets. 


Life as such can be described in analogy with the game of snooker. There are times when one stands in the middle of the infinite corridor called life without any sense of direction, probably running in circles in search of something that he already has or something that he'll never attain. Thats the point where one feels low and slow, where one needs the warmth of another person. 

Mathematically humans are a set of mutually dependent variables where the probability of success and failure of each person is in someway tied to the others'. But where does the dependency come from?  Why is it that we have friends when the success rate of one of them is inversely proportional to the success rate of the remaining people. In most cases the competitive peers end up being the best of friends. School kids for example. At the age of 5 or 6 a kid being genuinely happy for his friend having scored a hundred in a math test while he scored less is the magic that binds people together. Sadly this fails to exist beyond a certain age. Love and friendship is lost when jealousy dominates competition. 


At one point man stands all alone, having to decide things all by himself, where none will help or can help with deciding. There comes into play, the force called motivation from another person. A few kind words can make all the difference. Even the strongest of men break down. At that point what one needs is a pair of hands to wipe the tears. Silence, patience and trust are the best gifts one can get from a friend when he confesses about a mistake.
A small hug. 
A friendly smile from a stranger. 
"Yes, you can" from your teacher. 
"You suck" from an enemy, 
"You will rot in hell" from your ex.
All these are words that will make a significant change in the way you see things the moment after you experience them. 

Even god wades through the dark with the assurance that some mortal who is travelling somewhere nearby is muttering his name. 

How facebook changed the face of people..

Came across this Mark Zuckerberg's shutting down Facebook news. The first thing that came to my mind was " Oh no what am I going to do without Facebook?" And when I started thinking, yes thinking, what the big deal about Facebook was, I realised I'll be one of the few who is not so heart-broken. Yes, I'm addicted to Facebook, waste plenty of my quality time on it. There was one 16 year old kid who'd commented " Everyday, I spend about 10 hours on Facebook. What would i do with all that free time now?" My reply would be, "May be try growing up in your free time". It has become an obsession for so many like me. Though I made a few really good friends on Facebook, I think I'd've made many more of them if I were interacting with people for real. I personally feel that with every random friend we make on Facebook we get more lonely.

What life was and what Facebook has made it into?


When someone's in a distress we used to feel sorry for them, now we 'like' when someone's sad.

When someone gets a girlfriend/boyfriend they used to TELL people, now they update their relationship status.


We used to make friends, no we are making fraands.


"How are you" used to make sense, now its plain nonsense.


Personally, I love those 2900 plus pages that I've 'liked', still its creepy.

Relationships break because some boy/girl scribbles something-that-is-not-to-be-expressed-in-public on your wall.


One used to feel happy when people remembered your birthday, now even genuine wishes have become meaningless because you think Facebook notified them.


When people slapped you cried, now you 'like' it or worse, others 'like' it.


Half the number of people who were interested in Farmville actually know nothing about farms.

Parents used to talk to kids, now they 'chat'.

If one had updated his status as much as he did with his Facebook account in real life he'd be the most respected man in town.

When you see people being bullied on Facebook forums, its plain sad.


One wouldn't even smile at strangers, now he adds random people because they both 'like' the same brand of toilet paper.


There used to be genuine fans for people, now there are more fan pages than fans.

I'd love hugs but sadly they don't exist offline.


Patriotism was a feeling of the heart, now the more one hates others the greater patriot he is.


Saying 'fuck you' is easy, being on the other end is hard.


Creativity existed, now Plagiarism is the new creativity.


You made friends, now you request people to be your friend.

You used to quote people, now you imitate people.

Those and so many, Facebook had played its part in changing people forever. This reminds me of a couple of fan pages, yes Facebook effect,


Facebook is the only place where you are allowed to write on walls and poke people.


If Facebook was ever shut down, people would be walking the streets poking strangers and writing on walls.
Now, we'll know if that's the case if the shutting down of Facebook is not some sort of hoax.


Get real. Get a life.

சித்திரமும் கைப்பழக்கம்..

சித்திரமும் கைப்பழக்கம்
செந்தமிழும் நாப்பழக்கம்

காலைப்பனி, கதிரவன்
குளிர்காற்று, குருவிச்சத்தம்
இவற்ற்றை ரசிக்க
அதிகாலை எழுதல் பழகு.

எதுகை மோனை
காதல் கோபம்
இவற்ற்றை ரசிக்க
தமிழ் படித்தல் பழகு.

கடல் கடந்து சென்றாலும்
பெயர் நிலை நிருட்ட
தமிழில் புரிந்து
பல மொழி பழகு.

மரமும் கொடியும்
அழகாய் தெரியும்
நாட்களை ரசிக்க
காதல் பழகு.

வீரம் காட்ட
குரோதம் நீக்க
ஆழ் மனம் அடங்க
ரௌத்திரம் பழகு.

எல்லா கேள்விக்கும்
விடை ஒருவன் அறிவான்
என்று நம்பி
ஆத்திகம் பழகு.

அத்தனை பதிலயும்
அப்படியே நம்பாமல்
ஆழ்ந்து யோசிக்க
நாத்திகம் பழகு.

எல்லா நிலையிலும்
உனக்கு மேல் ஒருவன்
இருப்பதை எண்ணி
அடக்கம் பழகு.

உன்னிடம் இருப்பது
உழைப்பால் வந்ததாயின்
உரிமை கொண்டாடி
ஆணவம் பழகு.

 பத்து வயதில்
எனக்கேன் இதெல்லாம்?
பதினெட்டில் புரிந்தது
சித்திரமும் கைப்பழக்கம்.

The usual suspects

Clearly, longer your post the more uninviting it is to the eye of your reader. But its seldom that i'm able to make myself write something huge and at the same time worthy of a second read to myself.

This is what I feel after receiving feedback like "Too lengthy", "Started reading, but slept half way through", "Will read the second half in my re-birth" and "Did you even type the whole thing?"

So, before I fill my current post with my opinions on my previous post here we go.

Had a blue week, eight of the seven days were bad.Fights and failed.. no epic failed tests.Days were as boring as they could get.This is life's irony.Good things don't happen when you don't want them to.( Sigh, I can't restrict myself from using the word Life in my posts and sure as hell the post gets labelled philosophical) 

From the polambals in the first few lines to the pombalais that I come across everyday, there are reasons you,me and he state for anything that happens in your,mine and his life.And the blame game, love it dontcha?

These are the usual suspects:

Fate:

"Thy hath been destined to suffer".

This is one reason which is as lame as anything can get. 

Luck: 

Sheldon doesn't believe in luck.Enough said.

God: 

Ha! Name to be used in the beginning,end and in the middle of all crisis.

Yourself: 

No.That wouldn't be fair on my part.